I’ve been on a bit of a modern-AU kick recently, and I’ve been thinking about a really cool Shikako in your Wanderlust!AU uploading photos of her journey on a blog or something. (It doesn’t even have to be a modern AU, since advancement in Naruto’s technology skyrockets in peacetime)

jacksgreysays:

jacksgreysays:

image

Ahahahaha, I can totally imagine that with the twins:

“You went inside a volcano?!”

“In my defense, it was dormant at first.”

“AT FIRST?!”

Or,

“How did you get this shot of a giant shark?”

“… you probably don’t want to know.”

I also figure she really embodies Indiana Jones-but-real in her show:

“Let’s talk about the interesting agricultural based fuinjutsu of the ancient Gelel Empire!”

Turns into,

“Oh gods, why is there this shrine?

Why are there traps?

What do you mean a CURSE?”

I also, also think there’s probably one episode where it’s like:

jacksgreysays:

Ooh! Okay, so part of me feels like any weird technological gaps that canon has could easily be handwaved away in DoS specifically because they’re already on track for that and also Shikako just expects more from tech that even if she’s not the one inventing/improving various tech she’s at the least hinting at something like–hey wouldn’t it be neat if this phone was also a camera? Or, have you considered a wireless network?–but that still will take about a decade or two for the Naruto world to get to modern level.

I imagine, at first, since cameras have been noted to be like clunky for elites and still film based, that she would have to either pay ridiculous amounts of money OR justify why she needs one. The easiest reason I can think of is to further her fuinjutsu research. So at first its very official, almost like police officers with using their weapon: she has a set amount of film and has to keep account of every roll that she uses.

So most of her photos are very cut and dry “see Figure 3” in academic papers on the remains of the Gelel shrine or something like that. But as a sort of protest/she has a few more cells left over she’ll take some pictures of some really spectacular scenery: the view of the galaxy (are they in the Milky Way?) in the desert, sunrise on the horizon from Uzushio, etc etc.

Someone in Intel (maybe Shiho?) is in charge of directing her reports to the right places, but since the landscapes aren’t actually for intel, she just collects it (with proper labelling because Shiho is a proud paperwork nin) until Shikako returns to Konoha for a bit.

And it’s like: oh, I’ve collected your landscapes, Shikako! And there’s just this huge album of them neatly arranged and labelled that Shikako doesn’t actively remember taking. Like, she remembers taking these pictures but she didn’t realize how many of them there were that had accumulated.

And maybe this exchange is during a kunoichi meetings, so the other ladies see it and are all oohing and aahing over it (because no one really vacations as a shinobi. They travel for missions or for training, but hardly ever just to sightsee) so it’s greatly appreciated.

And then someone (probably Ino, because the Yamanaka own a publishing company on behalf of the Ino-Shika-Cho clans) has the idea to publish it. And it is REALLY well-received by the civilian population because they get to travel for sightseeing purposes even less frequently than shinobi. (And there are some views that literally no person has seen in decades or centuries because Uzushio has been abandoned or it’s a place that’s too dangerous with little return). So it’s really just accidental, I think, this following that Shikako garners from photography.

Then, as technology advances so too does her camera (and the Nara clan probably sponsors a really nice one both for the fuinjutsu research and the landscapes) and then the medium that its shared.

Copycats follow (because its an easy way for a shinobi to make money, and no doubt Cloud nin would be all about risking their lives for the perfect shot) but by the time blogging is around, Shikako herself has a following and that in itself has accidentally become a bit like “Man vs. Wild” even though she was originally aiming more for a “How It’s Made” or “Wonders of the Ancient World” or one of the other less action-packed National Geographic/Discovery Channel shows.

Whoops. (The Director of the Princess Fuun movies is probably involved somehow)

“This seal says something about ‘caging the dragon’ but considering chakra pathways used to be called dragon’s veins that’s probably just a metaphorical phrase. Most likely they mean harnessing a point of high natural chakra emissions.”

Twenty minutes later,

“NOT METAPHORICAL. I REPEAT, NOT A METAPHOR!”

Kankurou is her camera person just the once (he refuses forever after that) but it’s one of the favorite episodes despite the low-res video and frequent shaky cam and that static from corrupted data (this is pretty early on in the series, before heavy duty tech). After that, regardless if she’s the adoptive Mother of the NGSS, it’s poor Shinki who gets conscripted as her camera person.

Then again, I feel like The Director probably trained a group of similarly-minded camera people who would be not just excited, but honored to be official camera person of “Konoha Nara versus *insert adventure setting here*”

image

I feel like the general culture of Cloud would be more embracing of the adrenaline junkie styles despite her being from Konoha, but I also do wonder if the Rock shinobi develop a Mythbusters/Snopes equivalent purely to spite Shikako’s blog, but then it turns out everything is legit and they’re just like… what the hell? How?

There’s definitely one episode that has to take place in Land of Earth or Land of Stone (because the Old Western setting would be hilariously entertaining) and Rock shinobi are trying to stealth prove that Shikako’s show is a hoax within the episode, but nope. AAAAAALLLLL REAL.

Gaara is only in the show twice for collectively less than five minutes and possibly not even in the same scenes as Shikako? Or, like, he’s way in the peripheral or he doesn’t even interact with Shikako directly? But all the shippers are just over-analyzing: “DID YOU SEE THE WAY THEY LOOKED AT EACH OTHER?” or “THE WAY HE PAUSED AFTER HE SAID HER NAME, OTP!”

Depending on how much Shikako keeps a hand on the pulse of her fandom, she might know but she’ll definitely be confused.

I’ve been on a bit of a modern-AU kick recently, and I’ve been thinking about a really cool Shikako in your Wanderlust!AU uploading photos of her journey on a blog or something. (It doesn’t even have to be a modern AU, since advancement in Naruto’s technology skyrockets in peacetime)

jacksgreysays:

image

Ahahahaha, I can totally imagine that with the twins:

“You went inside a volcano?!”

“In my defense, it was dormant at first.”

“AT FIRST?!”

Or,

“How did you get this shot of a giant shark?”

“… you probably don’t want to know.”

I also figure she really embodies Indiana Jones-but-real in her show:

“Let’s talk about the interesting agricultural based fuinjutsu of the ancient Gelel Empire!”

Turns into,

“Oh gods, why is there this shrine?

Why are there traps?

What do you mean a CURSE?”

I also, also think there’s probably one episode where it’s like:

jacksgreysays:

Ooh! Okay, so part of me feels like any weird technological gaps that canon has could easily be handwaved away in DoS specifically because they’re already on track for that and also Shikako just expects more from tech that even if she’s not the one inventing/improving various tech she’s at the least hinting at something like–hey wouldn’t it be neat if this phone was also a camera? Or, have you considered a wireless network?–but that still will take about a decade or two for the Naruto world to get to modern level.

I imagine, at first, since cameras have been noted to be like clunky for elites and still film based, that she would have to either pay ridiculous amounts of money OR justify why she needs one. The easiest reason I can think of is to further her fuinjutsu research. So at first its very official, almost like police officers with using their weapon: she has a set amount of film and has to keep account of every roll that she uses.

So most of her photos are very cut and dry “see Figure 3” in academic papers on the remains of the Gelel shrine or something like that. But as a sort of protest/she has a few more cells left over she’ll take some pictures of some really spectacular scenery: the view of the galaxy (are they in the Milky Way?) in the desert, sunrise on the horizon from Uzushio, etc etc.

Someone in Intel (maybe Shiho?) is in charge of directing her reports to the right places, but since the landscapes aren’t actually for intel, she just collects it (with proper labelling because Shiho is a proud paperwork nin) until Shikako returns to Konoha for a bit.

And it’s like: oh, I’ve collected your landscapes, Shikako! And there’s just this huge album of them neatly arranged and labelled that Shikako doesn’t actively remember taking. Like, she remembers taking these pictures but she didn’t realize how many of them there were that had accumulated.

And maybe this exchange is during a kunoichi meetings, so the other ladies see it and are all oohing and aahing over it (because no one really vacations as a shinobi. They travel for missions or for training, but hardly ever just to sightsee) so it’s greatly appreciated.

And then someone (probably Ino, because the Yamanaka own a publishing company on behalf of the Ino-Shika-Cho clans) has the idea to publish it. And it is REALLY well-received by the civilian population because they get to travel for sightseeing purposes even less frequently than shinobi. (And there are some views that literally no person has seen in decades or centuries because Uzushio has been abandoned or it’s a place that’s too dangerous with little return). So it’s really just accidental, I think, this following that Shikako garners from photography.

Then, as technology advances so too does her camera (and the Nara clan probably sponsors a really nice one both for the fuinjutsu research and the landscapes) and then the medium that its shared.

Copycats follow (because its an easy way for a shinobi to make money, and no doubt Cloud nin would be all about risking their lives for the perfect shot) but by the time blogging is around, Shikako herself has a following and that in itself has accidentally become a bit like “Man vs. Wild” even though she was originally aiming more for a “How It’s Made” or “Wonders of the Ancient World” or one of the other less action-packed National Geographic/Discovery Channel shows.

Whoops. (The Director of the Princess Fuun movies is probably involved somehow)

“This seal says something about ‘caging the dragon’ but considering chakra pathways used to be called dragon’s veins that’s probably just a metaphorical phrase. Most likely they mean harnessing a point of high natural chakra emissions.”

Twenty minutes later,

“NOT METAPHORICAL. I REPEAT, NOT A METAPHOR!”

Kankurou is her camera person just the once (he refuses forever after that) but it’s one of the favorite episodes despite the low-res video and frequent shaky cam and that static from corrupted data (this is pretty early on in the series, before heavy duty tech). After that, regardless if she’s the adoptive Mother of the NGSS, it’s poor Shinki who gets conscripted as her camera person.

Then again, I feel like The Director probably trained a group of similarly-minded camera people who would be not just excited, but honored to be official camera person of “Konoha Nara versus *insert adventure setting here*”

I’ve been on a bit of a modern-AU kick recently, and I’ve been thinking about a really cool Shikako in your Wanderlust!AU uploading photos of her journey on a blog or something. (It doesn’t even have to be a modern AU, since advancement in Naruto’s technology skyrockets in peacetime)

image

Ahahahaha, I can totally imagine that with the twins:

“You went inside a volcano?!”

“In my defense, it was dormant at first.”

“AT FIRST?!”

Or,

“How did you get this shot of a giant shark?”

“… you probably don’t want to know.”

I also figure she really embodies Indiana Jones-but-real in her show:

“Let’s talk about the interesting agricultural based fuinjutsu of the ancient Gelel Empire!”

Turns into,

“Oh gods, why is there this shrine?

Why are there traps?

What do you mean a CURSE?”

I also, also think there’s probably one episode where it’s like:

jacksgreysays:

Ooh! Okay, so part of me feels like any weird technological gaps that canon has could easily be handwaved away in DoS specifically because they’re already on track for that and also Shikako just expects more from tech that even if she’s not the one inventing/improving various tech she’s at the least hinting at something like–hey wouldn’t it be neat if this phone was also a camera? Or, have you considered a wireless network?–but that still will take about a decade or two for the Naruto world to get to modern level.

I imagine, at first, since cameras have been noted to be like clunky for elites and still film based, that she would have to either pay ridiculous amounts of money OR justify why she needs one. The easiest reason I can think of is to further her fuinjutsu research. So at first its very official, almost like police officers with using their weapon: she has a set amount of film and has to keep account of every roll that she uses.

So most of her photos are very cut and dry “see Figure 3” in academic papers on the remains of the Gelel shrine or something like that. But as a sort of protest/she has a few more cells left over she’ll take some pictures of some really spectacular scenery: the view of the galaxy (are they in the Milky Way?) in the desert, sunrise on the horizon from Uzushio, etc etc.

Someone in Intel (maybe Shiho?) is in charge of directing her reports to the right places, but since the landscapes aren’t actually for intel, she just collects it (with proper labelling because Shiho is a proud paperwork nin) until Shikako returns to Konoha for a bit.

And it’s like: oh, I’ve collected your landscapes, Shikako! And there’s just this huge album of them neatly arranged and labelled that Shikako doesn’t actively remember taking. Like, she remembers taking these pictures but she didn’t realize how many of them there were that had accumulated.

And maybe this exchange is during a kunoichi meetings, so the other ladies see it and are all oohing and aahing over it (because no one really vacations as a shinobi. They travel for missions or for training, but hardly ever just to sightsee) so it’s greatly appreciated.

And then someone (probably Ino, because the Yamanaka own a publishing company on behalf of the Ino-Shika-Cho clans) has the idea to publish it. And it is REALLY well-received by the civilian population because they get to travel for sightseeing purposes even less frequently than shinobi. (And there are some views that literally no person has seen in decades or centuries because Uzushio has been abandoned or it’s a place that’s too dangerous with little return). So it’s really just accidental, I think, this following that Shikako garners from photography.

Then, as technology advances so too does her camera (and the Nara clan probably sponsors a really nice one both for the fuinjutsu research and the landscapes) and then the medium that its shared.

Copycats follow (because its an easy way for a shinobi to make money, and no doubt Cloud nin would be all about risking their lives for the perfect shot) but by the time blogging is around, Shikako herself has a following and that in itself has accidentally become a bit like “Man vs. Wild” even though she was originally aiming more for a “How It’s Made” or “Wonders of the Ancient World” or one of the other less action-packed National Geographic/Discovery Channel shows.

Whoops. (The Director of the Princess Fuun movies is probably involved somehow)

“This seal says something about ‘caging the dragon’ but considering chakra pathways used to be called dragon’s veins that’s probably just a metaphorical phrase. Most likely they mean harnessing a point of high natural chakra emissions.”

Twenty minutes later,

“NOT METAPHORICAL. I REPEAT, NOT A METAPHOR!”

I’ve been on a bit of a modern-AU kick recently, and I’ve been thinking about a really cool Shikako in your Wanderlust!AU uploading photos of her journey on a blog or something. (It doesn’t even have to be a modern AU, since advancement in Naruto’s technology skyrockets in peacetime)

Ooh! Okay, so part of me feels like any weird technological gaps that canon has could easily be handwaved away in DoS specifically because they’re already on track for that and also Shikako just expects more from tech that even if she’s not the one inventing/improving various tech she’s at the least hinting at something like–hey wouldn’t it be neat if this phone was also a camera? Or, have you considered a wireless network?–but that still will take about a decade or two for the Naruto world to get to modern level.

I imagine, at first, since cameras have been noted to be like clunky for elites and still film based, that she would have to either pay ridiculous amounts of money OR justify why she needs one. The easiest reason I can think of is to further her fuinjutsu research. So at first its very official, almost like police officers with using their weapon: she has a set amount of film and has to keep account of every roll that she uses.

So most of her photos are very cut and dry “see Figure 3” in academic papers on the remains of the Gelel shrine or something like that. But as a sort of protest/she has a few more cells left over she’ll take some pictures of some really spectacular scenery: the view of the galaxy (are they in the Milky Way?) in the desert, sunrise on the horizon from Uzushio, etc etc.

Someone in Intel (maybe Shiho?) is in charge of directing her reports to the right places, but since the landscapes aren’t actually for intel, she just collects it (with proper labelling because Shiho is a proud paperwork nin) until Shikako returns to Konoha for a bit.

And it’s like: oh, I’ve collected your landscapes, Shikako! And there’s just this huge album of them neatly arranged and labelled that Shikako doesn’t actively remember taking. Like, she remembers taking these pictures but she didn’t realize how many of them there were that had accumulated.

And maybe this exchange is during a kunoichi meetings, so the other ladies see it and are all oohing and aahing over it (because no one really vacations as a shinobi. They travel for missions or for training, but hardly ever just to sightsee) so it’s greatly appreciated.

And then someone (probably Ino, because the Yamanaka own a publishing company on behalf of the Ino-Shika-Cho clans) has the idea to publish it. And it is REALLY well-received by the civilian population because they get to travel for sightseeing purposes even less frequently than shinobi. (And there are some views that literally no person has seen in decades or centuries because Uzushio has been abandoned or it’s a place that’s too dangerous with little return). So it’s really just accidental, I think, this following that Shikako garners from photography.

Then, as technology advances so too does her camera (and the Nara clan probably sponsors a really nice one both for the fuinjutsu research and the landscapes) and then the medium that its shared.

Copycats follow (because its an easy way for a shinobi to make money, and no doubt Cloud nin would be all about risking their lives for the perfect shot) but by the time blogging is around, Shikako herself has a following and that in itself has accidentally become a bit like “Man vs. Wild” even though she was originally aiming more for a “How It’s Made” or “Wonders of the Ancient World” or one of the other less action-packed National Geographic/Discovery Channel shows.

Whoops. (The Director of the Princess Fuun movies is probably involved somehow)

I really like your Year With The Moon ficlets! The protagonist is pretty unique in getting a sandshrew, and the dissociation in her life before starting in the Pokemon journey felt very realistic.

Really? I’m honestly surprised. I appreciate it, but I’m bewildered. Like… I admit, with most of my series, I don’t really have much of a plan, but A Year With The Moon especially I have no idea what I’m doing.

Part of me doesn’t want to derail completely from canon considering Ember wouldn’t actively do that in order to make sure Ash develops similar enough to canon that he can be in those key points to save the world (much like how Shikako is particularly hands off with Naruto in comparison to Sasuke). But that does mean that I would have to go the Dreaming of Sunshine route of somehow reiterating canon material while elevating it and I honestly do not think I have the writing chops for that.

Because. Wow. Dreaming of Sunshine is fantastic. It is just. I mean, obviously, I wouldn’t write so much recursive fanfic of it if I didn’t love it so much. But it is way above my skill level. Just. Wow. SQ’s ability to world build within a set world, the way they not just use fillers but turn filler episodes into emotionally charged arcs, I’m just. O_O

Ideally, A Year With The Moon would by like that. Actually, ideally, a lot of my series would be like that (I also have Into Thin Air which is FFVII Cloud’s twin Windy, I have Counterpoise and B*tch Please which is Naruto and Akamaru’s twin respectively, I have a couple of other SI!OCs or just regular OCs who aren’t twins in various fandoms…)

But, like I said, I don’t have the writing chops for that. Part of it is, I’ll admit, commitment. SQ puts in a lot of time and effort of researching and outlining for DoS which I do not do with A Year With The Moon–could I? Probably, yes. If I put other things to the wayside and focused solely on this series. Will I? Probably not any time soon.

A lot of this blog is me expelling ideas that come to me during the day–I move between fandoms and writing styles fairly frequently. Maybe one day I’ll be able to hone in on one series and go to town on it, but for now A Year With The Moon will have to suffer from being my last second, “oh god I need to put a post up, let me get a word prompt, hm okay Pokemon?”

Sorry, to-someplace-else, I didn’t mean to rant at you. I appreciate that you like the series, and A Year With The Moon does have a surprising soft spot in my heart too (my very first fandom was Pokemon), but unfortunately I don’t think I can do the series justice any time soon and give it the attention it deserves :/

I’m so angry right now??? I know you’re big on DoS stuff and I just went into the story’s reviews and saw some ridiculously nasty flame?? I need to be angry with someone?? I don’t know I’m not eloquent but it came from someone who is and I’m having a hard time saying why the flame is ridiculous and why I’m angry and I want to tell Silver Queen not to let it get to her but I don’t have an account so help please???

Well… the best way to contact Silver Queen regarding a flame would be to leave a review of your own? I’m pretty sure DoS still allows anonymous reviews. You can try something like “Hey SQ, don’t even mind that flamer, DoS is great. I especially love this part of this chapter when…”

I don’t know what else to say, anon, but when it comes to fanfic the best way to fight hate is with love. Writers will eventually get flames–I’ve gotten flames and I’m not even that particularly popular or prolific in comparison to SQ. So give her something else to think about instead. Write an in-depth review about what you liked about a chapter or the fic as a whole, those are always more memorable than a short “Love your fic, fuck that flamer, they don’t even know what they’re talking about,” because that will just bring attention back to the flame itself.

I mean, presumably you’re reading it off FF.net, right? Accounts are free there, it’s pretty easy to make one. So there’s a Private Messaging system on there if you want something more direct than a review. Most fic hosting sites have a way to flag comments either as spam or something like that, so you can try that as well? Or you can send a message over to @dosbysilverqueen, since SQ is also an admin there and at least its a little more direct than having me be middle man. I mean, I’ll still see it since I am the other admin, but jacksgreysays is my personal writing blog whereas dosbysilverqueen is specifically for DoS.

Not that I don’t appreciate being considered some kind of DoS shepherd or an embassy for DoS fans, but there were a lot of other ways to go about doing this anon.

I love your writing! What are your favorite soulmate AUs, if you have any? Or what other AUs are you weak for ;)

Thanks, anon! I’m glad you like my writing 🙂

Hm let’s see soulmate AUs I’m fond of…

I actually only recently learned of the “whatever is written on your soulmate shows up on your skin as well”!AU (aka the Protean Charm Soulmates!AU as I call it for brevity) but I really like how adaptable it is. Like, each relationship is different and this method of soulmate AU can reflect each unique relationship in turn.

Like, even without having other people involved, do the soulmates write to each other? If so, how often? Who writes more? Or, if not, why not? Is there a language/literacy barrier? Is one just naturally more reticent than others?

Other than that I’m also fond of the “first words”!AU and the “sting of fate”!AU for opposing reasons:

“First words”!AU just has a very strong sense of attention and fleeting–you and your soulmate WILL meet and this WILL be their first words to you, but you also have no idea who or when that will be so you always have to pay attention. For some people, the phrase will be something innocuous, for others it’ll be wild.

I also kind of want to explore the idea of blanks in this universe. Are they people without soulmates? Are they people who have soulmates but won’t meet them for reasons (perhaps they’re fated to die before they meet)? Are they people whose soulmates can’t speak? (And, for that matter, how is mutism/muteness treated in this universe?… though I’d be hesitant to broach this topic since I myself am not mute and wouldn’t want to appropriate a disability and no doubt misrepresent it for a fic)

Conversely in “string of fate”!AU, I like the solidity of it. Whether you go with the “everyone can see your string” or “only soulmates can see the string” versions of it. You have a string? You have a soulmate. No string? No soulmate. Very flat out.

You may not meet, but you have one and you even know in what vague direction they are. Maybe some people will be more proactive and search for their soulmate, follow the string. Maybe some people will let fate decide. Maybe some people can’t leave and find comfort in knowing their soulmate is out there, somewhere. Maybe some people don’t care.

As for other AUs… like… I’m assuming not established media such that it would be a crossover/fusion (which I’ve already gone over in length here)…

For epic fantasy/sci-fi worlds, I really like putting the characters into non-powered!AUs, especially. Well, actually, I guess technically this is established media, but a Notting Hill!AU? I encountered the AU in fandom before the realizing it was an actual movie, but basically it’s about a famous actor and a bookstore owner meeting and falling in love and the whole disparity between their worlds.

I once read a fic which expanded the movie further to include more characters in more roles, so it’s this balance between who is the actor, who is the bookstore owner, which characters fall on either side of the divide for the intents of the AU. For example, with a Shikako/Gaara version, that one’s pretty obvious–Gaara as the actor, Shikako as the bookstore owner, and the respective village lines falling into place. But for a Shikako/Sasuke version?

I mean, Shikako would still be the bookstore owner (because stage fright) but which characters are part of “Sasuke’s world” and which are part of Shikako’s. Where does Naruto go? Kakashi-sensei?

I’m also pretty fond of modern royalty!AU for the same celebrity vs common person disparity.

I also enjoy stuffing super powered people into office spaces–general corporate workers, or lawyers, or minor government positions (a la Parks and Rec)–because inter-office drama is hilarious when it’s fictional. As the apparent success of either versions of The Office can attest to. And, sure, you can set things on fire in your original world but not here, friend, not here.

Conversely “real world” criminals is kind of nice, but with less emphasis on the crime and more on the team building (a la Leverage).

Ooh, okay, last one anon because I realize how rambly I’ve gotten: The florist and tattoo artist!AU, but the version where you swap the “obvious” designations. That one is so fantastic! I mean, I know not very much about either occupations, but I’ve read some fantastic iterations and they’re just the best. The best. Can replace florist for baker, but yes. Excellent. 🙂

Your poem really spoke to me (except the religion point, but, well, that’s personal) Thank you for being around.

Thanks, anon, for reading and understanding.

This year has been full of ups and downs for me: I usually write more when I’m happy and keep the anger or sadness inside me to fester, so being able to write out my more negative emotions is helpful. Articulating it is immensely helpful, just like knowing there are others out there who feel the same is helpful.

Stay safe, anon, we’re headed for some difficult times.

re: the election… same. my girlfriend cried herself to sleep in my arms on tuesday night, and i pulled an all-nighter out of numb terror. i’m not blindsided by the results, but i am heartbroken. young, mentally ill, disabled, trans, queer person of color. i’m considering chopping my brilliantly dyed hair, because every white person i pass on the street makes me flinch. i’m scared, but i’m just repeating “we’re stronger together, we’ll make it” in my head. it’s keeping me going. *offers hugs*

*gratefully takes offered hug*

I’m sorry, my friend, stay safe. Already I’m beginning to dress more conservatively than before–scared to go outside in the bright, provocative colors and patterns of someone without fear. I’m far more hesitant than I was before. I walk now with shoulders hunched, head ducked down, just counting the seconds until I can get to the safety of my car or my home.

I just found out the UPS truck driver that makes deliveries in my office building voted for Trump. I also, with shuddering disgust and fear, found out that he thinks I’m sexually attractive and has said as much to my one of my coworkers. Thankfully, said coworker is a man of color and has basically shut that down, but still. What the fuck.

How the fuck does the UPS guy think that’s going to work out? What was he expecting from my coworker much less from myself? What the absolute fuck.

No more shorts or sleeveless tops or skirts–autumn weather, thankfully, makes jeans and long sleeves and shape-obscuring jackets acceptable. But still. When the weather changes back, will I feel safe enough to return to that? My hair is cut short, enough that people notice–a statement style, asymmetric and shorn on one side. Will I have to grow that out? I’m not currently dating anyone, but I always liked having the possibility–will that still be something I can look forward to one day? Or will I have to hide my sexuality, tucked away like skin beneath layers of cloth.

I’m scared, too, anon. It’s shitty. Keep what joys you can, but do what you must to stay safe. Find your allies, stick together. It’s as you said: we’re stronger together, we’ll make it.