Alfie Enoch photographed by Maarten de Boer for Bello Magazine (outtakes)
Untitled drabble (2015-11-05)
This has been stuck in my head for at least two weeks and I don’t want to write it, but it’s also being really persistent. So I guess here’s a weirdly clinical take on the fuck-or-die situation that still has potential for a consensual romantic relationship happen? I dunno… I’m an aro sex-averse ace 
This drabble is probably NSFW.
Darren’s morning routine goes as such: wake up, spit about 30 mL of saliva into a specimen cup, prepare and eat breakfast, brush teeth, masturbate, collect semen into an enema bag, pack cup and bag into backpack, change pajama pants into workout shorts, jog for an hour, end jog at Thomas’ apartment. He has a key to Thomas’ apartment, specifically so he can let himself in, so Darren is unnerved when the door opens before he can do so.
The guy that is on his way out startles back, looking as surprised as Darren feels. But he recovers much more quickly than Darren does, a smirk sliding onto his face after his eyes make a quick assessing glance up and down Darren’s body, “Tommy’s obviously got a type,” he says, before shoving his way passed, and leaving. No introductions needed or wanted.
Fine by Darren, he has more important matters to attend to. And Tommy? Thomas hates it when people call him that.
Darren locks the door behind him and heads directly for the bedroom. No need to knock or call out, Thomas won’t be awake. He can’t be; not without Darren.
Thankfully, there isn’t an overt stench of sex, but the marks littering Thomas’ skin speak well enough about what he and his rude visitor did last night. A flare of jealousy burns beneath Darren’s skin, but he breathes and dismisses it.
This is how the rest of Darren’s morning goes: he takes off his shirt soaked by sweat–from sleep and exercise both–and gently puts it on Thomas. The specimen cup is placed on the nightstand by Thomas’ bed, the enema bag in his bathroom by the sink. Then he goes to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for Thomas.
As he pulls out ingredients for an omelette, Darren hears the sound of movement from the bedroom, his sweat beginning to take effect. As he whisks the eggs, he hears the plastic thunk of the specimen cup being slammed onto the nightstand, several shaky footsteps, and the sound of the bathroom door clicking shut.
The batter goes into the pan with a soft hiss.
In ten minutes, Thomas will finish with his own morning routine and find a meal but no chef in his kitchen.
—
It’s nobody’s fault. Not really. Darren happened upon a situation that he grudgingly called Thomas for help, Thomas stumbled upon the trap, Darren tried to pull him away, but the curse was placed regardless.
The team spent a week trying to figure out what exactly happened–unsure why one of their number lay uninjured but in a coma–until Darren, running on a total of ten hours of sleep, was sedated and practically shoved into bed beside Thomas for rest while the others continued to work.
Four hours later, Thomas woke up to a pair of clammy arms gripped tight around him, Darren in the throes of a nightmare. Of course, when Thomas attempted to wake Darren, he was only hugged tighter for his efforts.
But eventually they found out that skin contact was not enough; not by a long shot. Thomas would need more from Darren.
And Darren, in love with Thomas for almost half a decade, would never say no to him.
—
“No,” Darren says, hands curled tight into fists. Around him, his teammates look shocked, skeptical, confused.
“But…” Frances hesitates, but chooses to speak where the others do not, “You love him. Don’t you want to?”
“Not like this,” he answers with a shake of his head, “Not like this.”
Lina has finally found the information on the exact curse, along with previous cases where it was used, but given the last such case was over two hundred years ago… They have only ever gone with the most obvious answer.
What is sex? How exactly is this curse interpreting sex?
It clearly isn’t taking emotions into account, given the obvious undertones in the written records of the cursed, so it must be something of the physical act itself… or the tangible products of the act–sweat, saliva, semen–bodily fluids are almost as important to magic as intent.
Sonya is the one to suggest an alternative treatment plan. She says it exactly like that, “an alternative treatment plan,” and the rest of the team cringe at how clinical it sounds but Darren appreciates it.
Replicate sex without actually having it. A borrowed sweat-soaked shirt instead of naked skin. A single ingested dose of saliva instead of kisses. And, to put it bluntly, a semen suppository. One, two, three every day, and Thomas will never need to have sex with Darren.
Wanting is a different story.
~
A/N: I kind of don’t want to explain what exactly led me to this, though I will say that there was a fic involved. That fic was good and in no way involved fuck-or-die magic, but it did involve someone being infected by a poison where the cure turned out to be a different person’s sweat/natural oils. And there was a strange tension because the two characters were on the edge of getting together before said poisoning happened and now it’s like… I love you but I don’t know if you love me is this just the weird poison/cure arrangement or do you actually like me?
It’s better than I’m explaining and I would recommend it, but I also don’t want this drabble in any way connected with that because I am mostly ashamed of this and only wrote it to expel it from my brain. So… wow, if you got this far, I am seriously impressed by your fortitude.
Untitled drabble (2015-11-04)
“You’re kidding,” Alvin says flatly, eyes narrowed.
The doctor, in response, lifts one eyebrow. Even though it’s been years–over a decade–it still triggers an instinctive fear reaction in Alvin. He freezes, and she smiles, a slow creeping thing like a beast curling its lip back.
He lifts his chin. In humans, that would be a gesture of defiance, but in beasts…
“No, I’m not kidding,” the doctor finally answers, almost smug in her victory.
Alvin looks back down at the operating table, and ignores the persistent feelings of deja vu, of being a teenager lined up beside his teammates, listening to the doctor explain the latest mission. Before, there were pictures and files about the villain of the week. Now there are only two photos; the one on the left features a sullen-faced boy, the one on the right shows a somehow equally sullen looking lion cub.
“Cats and dogs, doctor!” he protests, futilely.
She is clearly unimpressed, “Hari isn’t some house cat, and you’re not a dog. Come now, Silverfang, what are you afraid of?”
The problem is, Alvin actually is a licensed foster parent. He needed to be in order to prove himself a suitable guardian for his niece and nephew.
It was a hassle to do–given the political climate a decade ago and the fact that he was, is, a homosexual bachelor–and so he makes sure to keep it up-to-date even though Diana and Jericho are both legal adults and have no need for him to do so.
Alvin didn’t really think it would be used against him, “Fine,” he huffs, “I’ll meet him.”
~
A/N: ?
Untitled drabble (2015-11-03)
Iris notices her rival is playing with her off hand before they ever actually speaking to each other. Besides the polite “thank you for the game,” of course. Her rival, one Regina Monarch, is left handed–normally moving her pieces around with the left, and fiddling with her opponent’s captured pieces with her right.
But today, Regina is placing her pieces with her right hand, her left arm hanging motionless at her side.
And Iris notices.
Of course, Iris doesn’t bother to think about what this might mean because she’s a little busy focusing on playing her top game against her rival in the final match of the state championship. But, that’s what R is for.
“Thanks,” R says dryly, a few hours after the tournament has concluded. The tournament which Iris won.
“I know, I was there. Watching, cheering you on, being a supportive sister,” R says with a roll of her eyes, “You’re getting off topic. We were talking about Regina.”
Yes, Iris’ rival.
“I think she hurt her left arm,” R says, before her mouth twists into a grim frown, “Actually,” she corrects, “I think someone else hurt her left arm.”
~
A/N: Tiny drabble, went in a different direction than i thought it would…
Fake Fic Summaries 9/?, the Community x The Martian crossover edition (2015-11-02)
A/N1: Just watched The Martian, it wasn’t in any way groundbreaking or innovative but it was still very enjoyable. Also, I love Donald Glover and he was fantastic in this movie.
I don’t think I have the chops to pull off a fic like this, hence fake summary and tiny drabble only. Anyway, let’s roll.
~
The Gravitational Pull of Triple Star Systems (title subject to change)
After two assassination attempts, FBI Agent Annie Edison is given authorization to do whatever it takes to keep NASA astrodynamicist Rich Purnell alive. So she takes him home.
Home being, of course, Hawthorne Manor.
—
Well, I saw Rich Purnell in The Martian and immediately thought–that is Troy’s body with Abed’s personality and Annie’s determination/intelligence. Then I had weird OT3 feels and had to reread some Community fic.
And here we are.
This is after Season 6, obviously, in which even though the trio went to pursue their different dreams, they can still make a home together. Given that basically everything has been left to Troy (although I forget if that specifically included the manor or not) so long as he finished the around the world boating journey, I figured it would give Troy a sort of wanderlust. And, also, LeVar Burton is cool so maybe Troy simultaneously invested in a new educational show for him, like different cultures around the world for kids. It became wildly successful and, as producer, Troy gets to join the crew as well.
I have a lot of little head-canons like this for the three of them that I would like to fit in.
Like how Abed’s first big hit was actually a documentary of LeVar and Troy’s around the world trip with claymation for the parts that weren’t filmed/photographed. It’s widely heralded as one of the most educational family films of the twenty first century. Which, okay, is very specific but as an independent filmmaker that is very impressive. More recently he wants to or has been authorized to work on The Martian documentary (the Ares IV or V having brought back all of Mark Watney’s log footage and taking pictures of the Hab).
I also have a weird desire to have Annie’s skyrocketing success in the FBI be due to all the weird shit that she learned/put up with at Greendale. Like she just finds all the training to be kind of boring in comparison to paintball wars, and all those weirdly specific classes mean that she has a completely different knowledge set than her peers. A successfully different knowledge set at that. Also, let’s be honest, she probably went to visit Shirley at one point and got involved with the weird supernatural crime drama that is The Butcher and The Baker (like a special two-part episode). The FBI greatly appreciates agents who can thrive when everything becomes incomprehensible.
Anyway, so the three of them aren’t really at the manor all that often, because their jobs require them to be elsewhere but they try their best. When the events of the summary occur, Annie figures the safest place is a well-fortified manor in a tiny city no one has really heard of, Abed is in between projects (or maybe he does the majority of his editing in the Hawthorne manor, a la Christopher Walken’s role as the director in America’s Sweethearts ), and Troy just got back from another episode of LeVar’s show. Finally, Rich has found people as lovely and ridiculous as him.
Not necessarily saying that my OT3 has expanded into a crossover OT4, buuuut… here’s an unfinished drabble:
Troy’s brain is still set to a different time zone, but he does his best to join them for breakfast whenever possible. Shuffling into the dining room, Troy greets them.
“Good morning, Abed,” he mumbles, brushing a sleepy kiss to Abed’s cheek, “good morning, Annie,” he continues, doing the same for her.
“Good morning, Troy,” he finishes, smacking a third kiss onto Rich’s bewildered face, before wobbling his way towards the coffee pot.
It takes almost a full minute, Annie and Abed exchanging silent glances, Rich shocked into stillness, but after a few sips of coffee the lightbulb turns on.
“Good morning… alternate timeline Troy?” Troy tries again, “You’re not the evil one, are you?”
“Troy!” Annie scolds, patting a greatly confused Rich’s arm soothingly. It helps a little until she says, “I would never let our evil selves into Hawthorne Manor."
"Also, his facial hair isn’t a goatee,” Abed adds, “It’s just a regular beard. And it’s his hair, not felt.”
From the expression on Rich’s face, the direction of the conversation is really not helping out his confusion. Even though, normally, he does get confused by people this really isn’t the same thing.
“Rich also still has his vocal cords intact,” Annie says, before looking significantly at him.
It takes him a few moments to realize she wants him to speak, because he stammers when he says, “Uh. Hi, I’m Rich. I work for NASA.”
“That’s cool,” Troy responds, earnestly, because it really is. It’s like Inspector Spacetime but real. And without the time travel. So maybe it’s just outer space, like Star Trek. Except not in the future. “I’m Troy. I don’t really work anywhere.”
“More like, he works everywhere,” Annie corrects with a proud smile.
~
A/N2: Aaaand that’s all I got for now… I highly recommend both The Martian and Community if you haven’t watched either.
Untitled drabble (2015-11-01)
You know what will happen if we don’t succeed.
If we fail.
“Don’t be redundant, please,” you say, perspiration beading along your hairline. Your hands shake almost imperceptibly, not enough to throw off your drawings but enough to make you paranoid of any possible mistakes.
“Also, stop narrating my actions. It’s bad enough I’m hearing a voice, it would suck if that voice didn’t contribute anything beneficial.”
You suck.
“You’re being immature,” and fine. Maybe you have a point.
“Thank you,”
You’re also using the wrong reference diagram.
“You son of a–you’re the one who said we can’t fail!” And there you go, throwing your chalk at the wall. Now who’s immature.
“Argh! I can’t believe the fate of the world relies on me and they send me the shittiest guardian angel of the flock.”
Oh don’t flatter yourself. You’re the eighteenth contingency plan, if the fate of the world actually relied on you we’d all be doomed.
~
A/N: Some strange almost meta but not really mashed out on my phone while awkwardly sitting with my separated parents in the car.
Counterclockwise (2015-10-31)
A/N1: I know, it’s no longer before midnight, but I came back from a Halloween party and spent about twenty minutes amazed at my activity because a BNF reblogged one of my posts. WOW, so many notes!
Anyway, let’s go!
~
Bastian has the temerity to let her try and fail five times before he says, “A time witch who can’t do time magic? That’s pathetic.”
Leanne, fed up with the blonde creep and his completely unhelpful and unnecessary comments, throws a rock at him. Annoyingly enough, he dodges, but she wasn’t actually expecting it to hit him anyway.
“I’m not a time witch,” she says through gritted teeth, because it’s true and she hates having to explain it to herself. In the day and age that she’s found herself in, they don’t have the vocabulary to explain what she is and how that differs from what they do know. As far as they’re concerned, she can do strange things, and so she is a witch. That her strange things involve time makes her, specifically, a time witch. But she’s not; she’s a meta-human with time based powers.
Actually, to be technically honest, she’s a meta-human with hair that photosynthesizes. Her time powers don’t originate from her, but from the pocket watch she inherited from her father.
The pocket watch that is, of course, broken.
After failure number six, Leanne pushes herself away from the spell components arranged on the ground, stomps over to Bastian, and grudgingly sits next to him on the canvas.
They sit in silence for a few minutes before Bastian, with the slightest hint of apology in his tone, says, “Time magic isn’t my specialty, either.”
And it’s still not right. It doesn’t make everything okay. They are both still stuck in this century that fears and hates magic, with all of the problems but none of the benefits of having it. Worse, they are stuck with each other until they can each find their way home.
But she’d rather be stuck with Bastian, a complete tool who can barely say three sentences without some kind of insult, than be by herself. Because for all that he’s a jerk, she at least knows that he won’t let her get captured by the witch hunters and executed.
At least, not unless he’s been captured, too.
~
A/N2: Somewhat related to this drabble… HAPPY BELATED HALLOWEEN!
Iron Will drabble (2015-10-30)
You try not to project onto them, the Avatar and his friends, but you find it difficult not to. Even when they’ve made their opinion of you clear. But you don’t need them to like you for you to have an alliance, and when it’s a bunch of children up against the strongest nation in the world, you need all the allies you can get.
Even if you see too much of yourself in these allies. A child unable to return to his past yet yearning for those happier times. A girl cut so deeply by soldiers in red it haunts her dreams. A teenager standing up against armies with only his wits and a small blade. You appreciate the fact that when all is said and done, despite contradicting methodologies, you are still on the same side.
But you cannot afford to show any weakness, even if they are your allies. Still, you are grateful for them, and you have Gui act as a counter guide–he may not be able to match Jet’s charisma, but he is your partner for a reason. Gui is smart and honest and kind in his own way, if he can’t win the Avatar’s trust then you Forest Faction had no chance to begin with.
—
It kills you to say this, but you know you need to split up. The Freedom Fighters, whether they are Jet’s or yours, must be disbanded. Those with living family are to go there, but it still leaves a distressing amount left. Orphans are the lifeblood of the Freedom Fighters.
The Duke and Pipsqueak will never part, though that was not in question. After that, Jet only has Longshot and Smellerbee left, and three is not such a large group. The same cannot be said of your Forest Faction.
You, Gui, Tuzi, and the triplets. Six people. You are loathe to split the triplets, but there is no other way. They will attract too much attention, and they are still young and inexperienced.
In this venture, they need stealth and speed, they cannot stand out as anything more than refugees.
“See you in Ba Sing Se,” you promise to a solemn Gui and Tuzi, each with a triplet as a traveling companion. Beside you, Feng holds back her tears, though the same cannot be said for her sisters.
“You three as well,” you direct to Jet and his lieutenants. For all that you never quite saw eye to eye, especially towards the end, you and Jet were partners. Occasionally friends when you could stand each other, but guaranteed allies at the very least.
“Hey, don’t worry about us. We’ll be back together and fighting in no time,” Jet says with such confidence that you can’t help but believe him.
That’s the last time you see him alive.
~
A/N: First time posting on my mobile so we’ll see how it goes.
Character Analysis: Dreaming of Sunshine, Team Eight (2015-10-29)
A/N1: Check out Team Seven and Team Ten, if you haven’t.
Hinata
the Ego
Phlegmatic – Apathetic/Conflicted
(I/e=A)NFP – Idealist – Healer
Gryffindor
Neutral/lawful Good
Kiba
the Id
Choleric – Realist
ESF(P/j) – Artisan – Performer
Hufflepuff
True/chaotic Neutral
Shino
the Superego
Melancholic – Cynic
ISTJ – Guardian – Inspector
Slytherin / Ravenclaw
Lawful Good/neutral
Kurenai
the Mentor
Sanguine – Optimist
ENT(P/j) – Rational – Inventor
Ravenclaw / Slytherin
Lawful Neutral/good
I’ve decided not to do the Five-Man Band since I hate it and it doesn’t contribute much if anything to the analysis.
Surprisingly, Team Eight was fairly easy to do–the designations weren’t what I expected at the beginning, but they were easy.
Anyway, reasoning under the cut.
The Freudian Trio
Team Eight is an almost perfect representation of the Freudian Trio. My only hold back is that, in the beginning, Hinata (the Ego) doesn’t mediate between Kiba (the Id) and Shino (the Superego) so much as she lets them argue it out and have Kurenai (the Mentor) decide. Thankfully, Hinata’s entire character development is her gaining self-confidence so, if anything, Team Eight is become more like the ideal Freudian Trio as they grow older.
—
The Four-Temperament Ensemble / The Four-Philosophy Ensemble
Given my continued confusion over the Four-Temperament Ensemble, I ended up relying a bit more on the related Four-Philosophy Ensemble to make my decisions. Additionally, for this go around, I ignored the emotional vs rational binary amongst the Temperament (whereas in the Team Seven character analysis, I ignored the introverted vs extroverted).
Between the introverts–Hinata and Shino–it’s pretty obvious that Hinata is the people-oriented one and Shino the task-oriented one. Making Hinata the Phlegmatic one and Shino the Melancholic one. Likewise, Hinata matches the “Conflicted” philosophy more, whereas Shino matches the “Cynic” philosophy more (I definitely would not consider Hinata a cynic).
Amongst the extroverts–Kiba and Kurenai (I’m not entirely sure she is an extrovert, but we only ever see her in a group setting)–I believe that Kurenai is the people-oriented one. Considering her expertise is genjutsu–illusions of the mind–and her continued devotion to her students’ mental and emotional health. In contrast, I believe Kiba is the more task-oriented one–it’s not readily clear since he is in touch with his emotions (considering he’s the Id of Team Eight, he is emotions), but as far as it goes with his actions, Kiba is the kind of person to pursue a goal regardless of other people’s feelings.
With Kurenai as the Sanguine, and Kiba as the Choleric, that would result in Kurenai being the “Optimist” with Kiba as the “Realist.” Which is a little surprising to me, considering that Kurenai is the jounin sensei and Kiba the less experienced shinobi, but it… kind of makes sense. Kurenai is a recent jounin, a lot of her interaction with her team is hopeful–they’re her first set of students, she wants to see them succeed but more than that she wants to see them happy. In contrast, Kiba is member of the Inuzuka clan–which, from the outset, does not seem all that significant, all of the Rookie Nine are part of shinobi clans–but I perceive the Inuzuka clan, and Kiba’s immediate family in particular, to be very open and candid with their experience. As such, I get the feeling that Kiba is second-hand exposed to a lot of the shinobi world.
—
Myers-Briggs Types and Keirsey Temperament
(Review: Extroversion vs Introversion, Sensing vs iNtuition, Thinking vs Feeling, Judging vs Perceiving. _NF_=Idealist, _NT_=Rational, _S_P=Artisan, _S_J=Guardian)
As I’ve listed above, these are the types and temperaments that I believe matches each member of Team Eight.
Hinata: (I/e=A)NFP – Idealist – Healer
Hinata is comfortable on her own, but she does enjoy and crave company even if it makes her nervous (hence ambivert leaning towards introversion). Much of Hinata’s character is about belief–that she can do more and be more than her past. She remembers interactions as they affect her relationships, and is willing to take people at their words more than their past actions *cough*NEJI*cough*. Her behavior is definitely based on her emotions rather than logic. And she is more likely to wait and react than instigate activities.Kiba: ESF(P/j) – Artisan – Performer
Kiba, unsurprisingly, is an extrovert–while he can handle being alone (with Akamaru, that is)–he is more energetic around other people. He relies more heavily on what is tangible than abstract ideas, what he (and others around him) has experienced more than what might happen in the future. Considering he is the Id of the team, its unsurprising he’s more of a Feeler than a Thinker. As for my uncertainty on perceiving vs judging, well… Kiba is reactionary and adaptable, he doesn’t plan but rather stays open for possible opportunities, but he is decisive–once he does decide on a course of action he will pull through with it.Shino: ISTJ – Guardian – Inspector
Shino’s designations are pretty obvious, even though we know comparatively less of him. Introversion, is a bit of a guess, but he doesn’t seem to actively crave become energized by company. For both sensing and thinking, this is mostly because of the rare occasions where he does have dialogue. He lists out pieces of information and how it leads to the ultimate, logical conclusion. Likewise, this method of rationality leans toward the judging side rather than perceiving.Kurenai: ENT(P/j) – Rational – Inventor
As mentioned in the previous section, I do think that Kurenai is an extrovert (though we know very little of her as well). Additionally, given that she is a genjutsu expert, I believe that she would rely on her intuition more on her senses because she knows just how easily senses can be fooled. For all that she is in touch with her emotions, I don’t she is ruled by them necessarily–in some cases, I think she acts in spite of them. As for perceiving/judging, well, like with all of the jounin sensei, she has to be a little of both due to her career–as for why I think she’s leans more heavily toward the perceiving end, well, ultimately her behavior is in response to someone else’s actions or decisions.
—
Hogwarts Houses
I may be a little bias on this one, just because I’ve always had the headcanon that Hinata is a Gryffindor of the Neville Longbottom variety. With that in mind, Kiba would then be the Hufflepuff of the team–loyalty, determination; he’s not as much of the rabid badger Hufflepuff as Sasuke is, but he’s close. As for Ravenclaw and Slytherin, well, I’m not really sure.
Both Kurenai and Shino are intelligent, but given Kurenai’s intelligence leans more towards the creative and Shino’s the practical I tentatively say that Kurenai is the Ravenclaw and Shino is the Slytherin. Additionally, while it’s more a sign of his ability than ambition, Shino was one of two to make chuunin during the first exams. Then again, considering how difficult it must be for a genjutsu specialist to become a full jounin rather than be stuck as a special jounin, Kurenai must be ambitious as well.
—
D&D Alignment
As you can probably tell, I was a little unsure about alignments for Team Eight.
Hinata: Neutral/lawful Good. Hinata is clearly good–but her lawful leaning is actually detrimental to her; her character arc is her striving and failing to conform to her father’s idea of a Hyuuga heiress. It’s when she steps away from that standard that she grows into herself.
Kiba: True/chaotic Neutral. Of Team Eight, Kiba is the closest to being chaotic leaning–but while he does enjoy the occasional ruckus, he does adhere to orders so long as they are from someone he acknowledges as superior in hierarchy. As for neutral, pack is what is most important to him–so long as his friends and family are okay, he doesn’t really care about anything else.
Shino: Lawful Good/neutral. Shino is, if anything, more likely to bend the law to his own use or find loopholes which allow him to act. Luckily, he is good at heart–if in a cold utilitarian way, optimizing the most benefit for the most people; though he does make exceptions for his friends of course, hence the neutral leaning.
Kurenai: Lawful Neutral/good. Given the creativity needed for genjutsu, Kurenai doesn’t step out of line at all if ever; maybe it’s because she’s a recent jounin and doesn’t want to misstep. As for Neutral/good, I think her concern is centered around her team/Asuma/her friends–she doesn’t seem to extend that care to others. Then again, her actions aren’t inherently selfish so…
Missed Post (2015-10-28)
Character analyses take a while. Posting one later today.
JackSGreyson Says 