[lyrics by andwereallwevegot in this post and some modified from these lyrics in the episode The Message. Just to be clear, andwereallwevegot’s lyrics are bolded, the altered canon lyrics are italicized.]
Her name was Lapis Lazuli She was trapped in a mirror a prisoner long forgotten and it couldn’t be clearer Her name was Lapis Lazuli She came from far away She never really liked it here She didn’t want to stay
Lapis Lazuli, you fled into the bottom of the sea Lapis Lazuli, you were so mad, but then you came around to me
Her name was Lapis Lazuli She gave us quite a scare One morning when we went outside the ocean wasn’t there Her name was Lapis Lazuli It wasn’t an attack She took off for the world she knew and gave the water back
Lapis Lazuli, you flew away to outer space Lapis Lazuli, we were friends but you still wanted to leave this place
Her name was Lapis Lazuli She sent us back a call An urgent warning from the stars That darkness soon would fall Her name was Lapis Lazuli She sounded so alone The Home that she had found at last was not the home she’d known
Lapis Lazuli, they thought you were a criminal Lapis Lazuli, I know your friendship comes through subliminal
Her name was Lapis Lazuli She wanted to be free She’d felt so trapped so very long by us and them and me Her name was Lapis Lazuli I wish it wasn’t so She took her captor in her arms and dragged them both below
Lapis Lazuli, you chained yourself to the bottom of the sea Lapis Lazuli, I know you can’t, but I wish you’d come back to me
Her name was Lapis Lazuli I knew her for a while I might not see her anymore [But] I’m glad I saw her smile
~
A/N: Throwing my hat into the ring! I love how many different versions there are (which you can find here). I also tried to incorporate the melody Steven sings in The Message.
Please excuse my pitchy-ness in some parts… and the parts where I forgot how many syllables I had left in each line. Also, I realize I should have made that last note fall not rise since it was the ending. Ooooh well. I hope you enjoy 😀
In the world of espionage and assassination, being tall is not all what it’s cracked up to be. Sure, with longer limbs come superior reach and leverage, but your center of gravity is further from the ground, making it easier to knock you down and keep you there.
Outside of fights, which don’t occur as often as fiction would have you believe, extra height is not necessarily a benefit. An implicit intimidation factor can help in some cases, but in others it can be a disadvantage. If you need to, for example, walk away unnoticed from an explosion you’ve caused? Being tall is a hindrance.
If you’re six feet five inches, you’re at least half a foot taller than the average person in a crowd. Meaning you can’t exactly disappear when you’re sticking out like a sore thumb. Moreover, if you are that tall and have the muscles of a professional athlete without the clout of being one, the authorities likely aren’t going to believe you’re some innocent bystander. Especially with all that soot and debris on you.
In contrast, if you’re, let’s say, five foot three, then getting away is easy. When the top of your head is below the eye level of the people searching for you, it makes hiding effortless. In the unlikely event that they do pull you aside for questioning, there’s a greater chance they’ll believe you when you stutter out that you don’t know what happened. Add in some trembling and crying, and they’ll apologize to you for the traumatic experience.
–
If you’re shooting at an enemy, don’t aim for their head. While usually that means an instant kill, no matter how sharp a shooter you are, it’s very easy for them to dodge. Ducking is as simple as letting gravity pull you down.
Instead, shoot at their core–stomach, waist, chest. Ducking isn’t going to help them, and unless you’re shooting at an Olympic high jumper going the opposite direction isn’t going to help them either. Stepping to either side relies on them being able to predict the trajectory of a bullet going two thousand feet per second. It’s just not going to happen. So shooting at your enemy’s torso is best: not only is it harder for you to miss, you have a wide variety of vital organs to hit.
–
Youth is a double-edged sword. Correction, assumed youth is a double-edged sword. If you’re blessed with youthful features or even excellent makeup abilities, it’s easy to appear as an indistinct teenager. Unless you present yourself as a surly delinquent, or you’re surrounded by irrational morons, a teenager isn’t going to be held culpable for crimes more serious than shoplifting, graffiti, or terrible driving.
Of course, by disavowing any responsibility, there’s the risk of being pulled under the wing of some well-meaning authority figure. You can’t exactly break your cover, because that will put you back on the suspect list, which means you’ll just have to stick to your lies and wait for the opportunity to ditch the mother hen.
~
When you’re going undercover, everything about you has to match your backstory. Your clothes, your hair, your movements. That being said, make sure you use a backstory that you can take on without much effort. Even the best actors have trouble staying in character when they’re surprised or in pain, and those tend to be the moments when you need it the most.
The most common mistake is having an accent one moment, then losing it the next as you cry out in pain. Accents also tend to be the easiest to bust as fake–not remembering a supposed common acquaintance can be chalked up to faulty memory, but if you fluctuate between a Bostonian accent and a Jersey accent then people will know something is up.
Instead, consider changing your speech patterns: if you’re normally a concise and eloquent speaker, then mumbling and sprinkling in a few ums, and you knows, and I guesses, reinforces a cover more than a fake Louisiana drawl. To a listener, accents come from specific locations that can be tested and those tests possibly failed. Speech patterns, on the other hand, reflect a thought process, which gives you some leeway in your actions. It also means any changes in how you speak when under duress is attributed to the situation instead of inconsistent acting abilities.
~
A/N: I’ve been marathoning Burn Notice on Netflix… and to be honest I’m kind of ambivalent to it. Obviously I like it, otherwise I wouldn’t have gotten to season 5 (and counting), but it’s not really something that I’d make a fuss over. The writing is both good and inane–the overarching plot is almost as ludicrously complex as a soap opera’s and practically nothing is a surprise. But it’s well delivered inanity.
I wouldn’t say it’s Burn Notice fanfiction, but I liked the idea of a (somewhat condescending) badass trying to teach the ways of badassery to someone else, namely the reader. Maybe I’ll re-appropriate it into one of my already existing fanfic ideas (if I ever get around to actually writing a multi-chaptered story)–it’d work well in Naruto or Katekyo Hitman Reborn… or the Turk side of FFVII.
Also, I can’t guarantee the validity of my “advice” which is why I’m putting it in the original fiction tag. FICTION. Please don’t actually shoot anyone… or cause any explosions… thank you.
The one with the bleached hair? Ah, I see what you mean… Yeah, you were right. This is my kind of job.
Of course I’m right. Who do you think you got your skills from?
Well, you may be my grandfather but I’m a lot better at this than you are. Otherwise you wouldn’t be asking for my help, you decrepit old monkey.
Such disrespect! Ha! Just how I taught you.
Of course. But seriously–I’m not charging you for this, however if I do take this job you have to follow all the rules I give my clients, grandfather or not.
Rules? Can’t be too difficult.
It really isn’t, or shouldn’t be, but you’d be surprised at how poorly my clientele follow directions. I hope you won’t be added to that.
Lay it on me.
First, you have to listen to what I say. If I tell you to hold your breath, you do not breathe. If I tell you to destroy something, you break it and set the pieces on fire. If I tell you to–
Yeah, I get it.
Second, you need to stick to your goals. Once you set those goals you can’t turn back, I will be working to meet them so no regrets and no changing them mid-job.
Ah, that I may need help with.
I can help you create a list of what the possible results and situations may be, but you have to be the one to get your priorities in order.
Okay.
And third, the living get to live. The dead are here at my leisure. If there’s any sign that that kid is being possessed against his will or if it’s hurting him, then I’m performing an exorcism regardless of if that ghost is some kind of once in a lifetime genius. He already had his lifetime, he doesn’t get to steal another from someone else. Got it?
Yeah. I’d exorcise him myself if it were like that.
Please, you don’t have the juice to exorcise a goldfish much less a centuries old ghost. You weren’t even sure if there was a ghost involved. Eyesight going already? How will you play your board game?
Little brat, a real player doesn’t need to see the board to win.
Hm… Speaking of, set up a game with the kid. I need to get a closer read on both of them; don’t want to approach them cold. Can you do that?
Are you joking? I’m Kuwabara-Honinbou, if an insei won’t agree to play a game with me I might as well hand over my title to that upstart Ogata.
~
A/N: Uh… yeah. I guess I’m on a bit of an OC fanfic spree. So this is for currently unnamed granddaughter of Kuwabara-Honinbou who works as a medium. Which means she can actually see Sai–it’s highly implied that Kuwabara stopped and stared at Hikaru because he was able to sense Sai but the fact that he didn’t bring it up means that maybe he can’t see it so well?
She then figures out the dealio with Sai and Hikaru, but is mostly a spectator for their hilarious identity shenanigans. She only really steps in to prevent Sai from fading, and can be talked into providing an alibi for Hikaru by acting as Sai’s hands in NetGo in exchange for doing embarrassing favors.
She emphatically does not play Go. But people are really confused as to why Kuwabara’s granddaughter is hanging around an insei so at first they think she’s Sai but then they think Hikaru’s going to be Kuwabara’s apprentice…
[edit: sort of continued here. Also, now tentatively naming her Haru – Ash Night (灰夜), not Spring (春)]
[edit2: Series now called (En)Closure, follow that tag or the haru kuwabara tag for more]
Second post to make up for the missed 2015-02-13 and 2015-02-14 posts… This one is more of a rant than a ramble, and I found it rather hard to articulate what the idea was. But, basically, if all the civilians were police officers and vice versa.
Because I missed both 2015-02-13 and 2015-02-14 posts, partially because I was helping my sister move but mostly because I was marathoning Psych. Here is one (of two, the next is following) Psych inspired rambles! This is based off episode 7×08 Right Turn Or Left For Dead… and could be the “prequel” for a canon AU/alternate reality play fanfiction were I to actually write one.
“Half the fun of watching an Adelaide Jensen pokemon battle is actually watching the trainer herself!”
“Oh, definitely. You can just feel that she wants to jump into the ring and fight alongside her pokemon.”
“It definitely shows her Brawler class–she’s only one of five competitors to have qualified for this tournament by defeating 15 Dojos instead of the more common route of 8 Gyms,”
“She’s also the only one of them to get this far into the tournament, which is quite the feat considering this is her rookie year.”
“Top 32 is definitely an achievement for any rookie, but especially one who has spent most of the year fighting in Dojos instead of Gyms.”
“For viewers who are unfamiliar with the Dojo system and the Brawler class, the main difference is that trainers fight alongside their pokemon. There are some benefits to this–trainers build a better sense of camaraderie with their pokemon, and being involved in the battle means that the trainer must be better at strategizing and improvising,”
“Not to mention rather strong themselves,”
“Of course. But one noticeable cost to this style of pokemon battles is that often, trainers have to limit their moves to easily containable, non-lethal attacks. You definitely don’t see any hurricanes or draco meteors in a Dojo battle.”
“But Brawler Adelaide seems to have made this more of a technique than a limit.”
“I completely agree. Many of her pokemon have unorthodox moves to say the least. She only has the one fighting type, a Hitmonchan that has apparently been raised alongside her, but the rest of her team seems to also know some martial arts.”
“It’s the first time I’ve ever seen a Bellossom punch a Jolteon in the face, that’s for sure.”
“And her Gardevoir moves more like a Gallade!”
“Regardless of how far she gets in the tournament, I think we can both agree that she’s a trainer to look out for in the future.”
“Definitely. Ooh! And her Vespiqueen just drop kicked Navigator Greg’s Feraligator while using Giga Impact. Is it–?”
“It’s been knocked out! By a Vespiqueen! Viewers, this may not be the most majestic of battles but you have to admit Brawler Adelaide has some of the most entertaining battles you’ll see in this tournament.”
“Navigator Greg has just one more pokemon left, and unless it can take on Brawler Adelaide’s Vespiqueen–”
“Who has not been injured–”
“And her remaining two pokemon, then we and the viewers will get to see more of Brawler Adelaide in this tournament.”
“I know we’re supposed to be impartial but–”
“We’ve left that two rounds ago!”
~
A/N: Another attempt to make my voice sound like two different people. So, enjoy these commentators at a pokemon tournament, I guess.
When I looked into the mirror this morning I saw… myself.
… yeah. That’s usually what happens.
No! I mean, yeah, but I…
Are you okay?
I saw myself doing terrible things. Like… I was running in a forest, I was chasing someone and they were bleeding and scared… of me. They were scared of me.
How would you even–
And I was in a room with three other people. And one of them was you–
Cool.
No, because we were torturing someone.
Not cool.
Yeah. We were, well. You held his head underwater a couple of times. And then we chained him up and electrocuted him.
How long was this going on for?
Like two hours?
No I mean how long were you looking in the mirror for?
Only a few seconds.
And you saw… hours of this mirror world in which we’re evil?
I don’t know, it doesn’t make sense to me either.
Why are you even telling me this?
Because I got scared and I needed to share it with someone.
You needed to share your fear?
Yes, no. Never mind.
You need to focus okay?
I know.
There are three targets today. And this has to be their last day.
I know.
No dithering, no torturing. Just a straight, clean shot through the head. Jeez, we’re assassins, not brutes. No matter what that mirror world shows you.
~
A/N: I just kind of wanted to see if I could do a two person conversation? But my voice is still pretty recognizable as both. I WILL WORK HARDER NEXT TIME.
and who knows what they’ve learned in your shadow.
As for us?
Undoubtedly, there will be war.
There will be confusion.
Uncertainty mixed with tradition mixed with revolution.
Can you imagine?
That heady mix
*sigh*
Just breathe it in.
It goes down smooth,
vibrates in your chest.
The sound of heartbeats and footsteps,
marching in time.
Draw the bridge,
lock the gates,
set your guards along the walls.
(Or don’t.
Because they’re our brothers, not yours)
Prepare,
because we have.
And we’re eager and hungry,
and just this side of desperate.
Take one last drink,
one last sleep.
Kiss your queen,
hold your children.
Because tomorrow?
Is ours.
~
A/N: First “ramble” – as I like to call little recordings/podcasts. I’m not sure why this is what came out, but “King” led to oppression led to rebellion in my head. The “king” was highly implied, so I don’t feel too bad about not actually using the word.
This one was also a test to see how long an audio post can be in order for tumblr to support it. Future rambles should be longer.
JackSGreyson Says 