Ask Box Three Sentence Fic, 1/? (2016-10-23)

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(1 – anonymous – Shikako/Sasuke, jounin, realization of feelings)

Night has fallen, their mission completed, camp set up against a rounded cliff-face that can only very generously be considered a cave.

Sasuke has made a fire, but it’s the line of his arm against hers that makes her feel warm; solid and steady and supportive.

“I love you.”

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(2 – anonymous – Shikako & Kakashi, those left behind)

They left; she can still feel them slipping away, like water through her fingers, futilely trying to hold on.

She’s taken up a more nocturnal lifestyle–as if the light of day will make her loss seem worse–and their old training ground looks almost serene in the moonlight.

It’s the crackle of lightning, dangerous and familiar, that signals Kakashi’s arrival and there is comfort in knowing that someone else has been left behind, too.

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(3 – anonymous – Shikako/Kankurou, Chuunin Exams)

They are laughter and sarcasm and well meaning lies, shrugs and second-born children and casual competition.

He is a puppeteer for true–an enthusiastic prodigy of a dying art–but she is a Nara, shadow jutsu and shogi.

He thinks he is fighting for a father already dead; she knows what the real stakes are.

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(4 – @xxriverspirit – Shikako/Gaara, reincarnated modern!AU)

By the time she is walking and talking again, she has already mourned and moved on.

Or so she thinks.

But every time she spots–red hair, green eyes, dark tattoos on pale skin–it takes her a while to remember how to breathe.

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(5 – anonymous – Shikako/Neji, high school!AU)

There is a girl looking for TenTen that he doesn’t know–a second year, from the color of her tie, one year below him. At first he’s concerned it’s just a convoluted excuse to talk to him, but she’s really just here to drop of a notebook.

“Ah,” the girl says, eye catching on the advanced mathematics on his desk behind TenTen’s, “You might want to use a different formula for problem nine,” she continues, easily, and then turns and leaves.

~

A/N: I’ll post them up five at a time, I guess? This is fun! 😀

Walking Around (Diamonds and Spades), (2016-10-21)

About four hours into their first C-rank mission, Team Seven gets attacked and separated.

This is not entirely unexpected: Team Sevens are traditionally cursed with missions that go awry in the most bizarre manner possible.

What is unexpected is that it’s, somehow, all Konohamaru-sensei’s fault.

Teamwork is slow going–they’re not so much a team as they are a group of random peers shoved together and told to do their best.

Konohamaru-sensei doesn’t understand; after all, his genin team was made of his childhood friends and tutor.

Sakako is unused to cooperating with people who aren’t already dead, Boruto is unused to cooperating with people in general, and Mitsuki is just unused to people, period.

Sakako wakes up, sans weapons and shoes, on a cold cement ground three feet from an impatiently fuming Boruto, also sans shoes–sans jacket, too, which is odd.

“Tch,” he clicks his tongue, turns away, “Took you long enough,” he adds.

Annoyance or worry or both, she doesn’t know him well enough to guess, but when she sits up, cloth shifts and falls, black and red pooling into her lap–and that gives her some hint.

For all that Sakako has grown up on stories about her parents and Naruto-oji and their version of Team Seven–more like family than coworkers, that’s for sure–she doesn’t know Boruto outside the context of the Academy.

Just because their parents were friends, doesn’t mean they will be, and for years she was content to let their paths be separate.

Clearly, that is not what fate has in mind.

As Boruto hastily shrugs on his jacket, he gives her a rundown of the situation, which isn’t much: a solid cement room, no window, and a metal door that opens from the outside only.

Seal-enforced.

This is no storage room.

Mitsuki is easier to deal with, even if she doesn’t particularly like him. He’s a bit of a fanboy of her parents, and while she loves them, she doesn’t want to talk about them all the time like Mitsuki seems to.

Between her and Boruto is the weight of legends and an awkward lack of relationship to support it.

“Can’t you break it?” Boruto asks, tone grating and sneering–it’s taken her a while to realize that he isn’t actually trying to start a fight, that’s just what his voice sounds like.

Sakako examines the door, the complex scrawl of only half a seal–it only opens when the corresponding key half is nearby–shakes her head, they won’t be leaving through the door.

The walls, though, are a different story.

Sakako has geniuses on all sides of her family, can recognize it even when its hidden behind sleepy, lazy eyes and slouching shoulders. She can see it in Boruto, underneath his anger and bluster, that gleam of a genius trying not to give it away.

She knows if he’d just stop focusing on his dad and start believing in himself, he’d be an even better shinobi… and probably much happier.

“I know some Earth jutsu,” she tells him, hands pressed to the cement walls, “But not enough to completely tunnel through… If I had my pouch–ink or a kunai or even a senbon–”

“What do you need?” Boruto asks, stepping up beside her, yet again sounding more antagonizing than he actually means.

She bites back her irritation–he’s actually trying to help, after all–and traces a finger over the wall, “If I had something to write or carve, I think I can make an array essentially seal up a portion of the stone and make a tunnel that way.”

Some things they inherit from their parents; genetics and habits, nature and nurture combined.

Other things they get despite their parentage.

Maybe that’s how her friendship with Boruto needs to begin.

“Hey,” Boruto says, pulling off his weird necklace, and holding the pendant between his fingers, “Would this work?” With a flare in chakra, the metal begins to glow, a sharpened tip coming into existence.

“Thought of it myself,” he smirks, which she normally finds annoying but which she’s grateful for now, “Just tell me what we need to do to get out of here.”

It only takes a couple of minutes to carve out a modified storage seal–more vanishing than storing at this point–and another few minutes to follow the sounds of shouting and find their sensei and remaining teammate, fighting the guards of the casino they were assigned to investigate.

It takes even less time for them to join in the fray–even without their shoes or weapons, though Boruto finds those stashed away and tosses her her things.

Maybe when they get back to Konoha, she’ll teach him some fuinjutsu.

~

A/N: Some three sentence fic to fill this anon’s prompt–I originally started this as a next gen Team Seven fic, but it kept focussing more on Sakako and Boruto so…

It was harder to wrangle than I thought it would be, and I’m unsure if I got the feels across… and some of those sections are only “three sentences” if you’re being very generous. 😛

Hopefully next time will be better.

How To Adult Properly (And Maybe Heal Some People While We’re At It), a series of Team Medic ficlets 4/? (2016-10-18)

Sakura wakes to a thump somewhere in the vicinity of her feet, and the long, low groan of a hungover idiot.

It’s better than an alarm clock, really. Or, well, worse since she can’t just smash Youbirin in one hit to shut him up.

“Sakura,” Youbirin says, voice muffled by the blanket she’s kicked off in her sleep and the way he’s practically kissing the floor, “Sakura, ow. Sakura… how? Why, Sakura? Why this?” He asks, as betrayed as a muddled-minded moron like him can be.

She gives a groan of her own, pressing it into the pillow, before kicking in his direction. She’s not augmenting it–it’s too early for that shit–but she feels a connect and Youbirin curls away with another pained moan.

“Go away. I’m not on shift and it’s before noon, you’re breaking the rules.”

Youbirin crawls his way up the bed, falling obnoxiously on top of her. It’s far from sexual–only barely affectionate in nature, given that clearly he’s trying to smother the life out of her.

“Get off me,” she wheezes as her lungs deflate beneath his weight, “Go away,” she repeats.

“But Sakura, this is my room,” the big baby whines, and then completely ignores her by wrapping himself around her.

She grumbles, but lets him, because he’s warm and she’s far too lazy to pull the blanket back.

They quiet back down, breathes coming in deeper and slower, the two of them shifting into a more comfortable position–Youbirin less of a big spoon and more of a giant koala with Sakura as the small and brightly colored tree.

“Wake me up before noon again and you’re dead,” she murmurs, tucking a cold nose to the collar of his pajamas.

Obediently, he recites, “After noon, coffee, got it,” before the both of them drift back into sleep.

Of course, they’re both woken up less than thirty minutes later when Jiro lands on top of them, climbing through the window in yesterday’s rumpled clothing to escape his latest one night stand.

Shishou, spotting the three of them and their less than impressive states, laughs–loud and long and entirely unnecessary.

“Nngh,” Youbirin grunts, looks two seconds away from dropping to the ground and curling into a ball in defeat.

Jiro, in contrast, tries and fails to respond with a smile of his own. It wouldn’t have worked even without the awkward lean he’s adopted where Sakura propped him against the wall.

Apparently, last night’s conquest–while easily impressed by medic-nin–was less than impressed by Jiro’s less than graceful “this was fun, goodbye forever” spiel. And, apparently, a trainee in T&I.

Sakura would like to think she doesn’t look as awful as her genin teammates, but she certainly feels as miserable, and she knows for the sheer travesty of her outfit, she’s going to have to avoid Ino today.

Shizune-senpai looks unfairly embarrassed by them: as if she never had to deal with Shishou in worse condition, and during her reign as Hokage at that!

When Shishou finally stops laughing, wiping a tear away from her right eye, she turns around and gestures imperiously for them all to follow.

Even in their disastrous states, the three–four, actually, including Shizune-senpai–hop to attention immediately. They may be embarrassments as people, but there’s no way they’re anything less than the best when it comes to being medic-nin.

~

A/N: Lalala, went out again to a swanky restaurant where we got soooo much free stuff because my sister’s got connections! Also, more drinking (well, less than yesterday, but still more than my usual which is zero)

Waking Up Starstruck (2016-10-12)

It doesn’t take much, just a slipped word or two. Drained and distracted and done–just… done.

If it had been something like, “This isn’t right,” maybe that could have been waved away. Right can mean unjust, wrong does not necessarily mean incorrect. “This isn’t right” doesn’t have any additional, damning, connotations.

“This isn’t how it’s supposed to be,” could be interpreted in a different way, too. An acceptable way. One that wouldn’t reveal her secret.

Instead it had been, “I don’t remember this happening,” and that, well, that’s the problem right there.

Telling people has never been an option for her. Not a viable one, anyway, dismissed immediately as soon as it flitted through her mind–

They’d hate me. It’d be a betrayal. They’d lock me up. I can’t do anything. They’d never look at me the same way.

Keep it secret, keep it safe.

–and so she shoved it in a dark corner of her mind, at the very bottom of a heap of other troubles and doubts and secrets. No taking it out to peruse, no brushing off the dust and considering, no daydreams about what if. Just cold, straightforward no.

But maybe, if she thought about it, when everything is over, when it no longer becomes relevant.

Maybe.

Telling her family seems almost blasphemous, no matter that home has already been proven less than sacred.

She knows there is a strain in their family. Knows it’s mostly because of her–her recklessness, her paranoia, her secrets–but it’s not something she inflicts purposefully.

She knows they’ll love her regardless, knows that they won’t turn from her–knows, in a way, that it would make them safer. Strategy only works when there’s information to plan on.

But it wouldn’t be the same; no longer daughter, no longer sister. A stranger living in their house.

That’s what scares her the most.

It can’t be Sasuke.

God, no, that wouldn’t work out well for anyone. It would break their trust, break their friendship, break him.

I guided you down the right path won’t matter–not when the first part invalidates the second.

I guided you. Might as well be I manipulated you, I tricked you, I controlled you.

If she told him, what would he hear? A chain of people using him for their own ends–Danzo, Itachi, Orochimaru, Obito, Madara–a chain only prevented because she got to him. Took his leash and kept it for herself.

She did it for his own good. Oh, yes, isn’t that what they all say? Make him safe, make him stronger, make him happy, make him blind to the truth.

No, it could never Sasuke.

Maybe Kakashi, if it were just them. She knows he’d never do anything to hurt her.

But she also knows that most of his life has been cultivated around the loss of Obito, and to find that Obito had been alive all along–that she had known about it her whole life–well.

He would forgive her, maybe, but he would never forget.

Some things are better left unsaid.

If. The foundation of all regret, if.

If she had done it sooner. If she had said something earlier. Acted differently, made those changes.

If.

So much of Ino’s life changed because of her. Wounded, strained, broken. If only she had–if only there was–if only–if.

If she had told Ino earlier, it might have been fine. But that door has closed, now, and she can only think: if.

If ever. If anyone. Maybe, possibly. Not now, but one day.

In the future, when everything has been resolved, no clouds or blood moons on the horizon.

It would be Naruto. Of course it would. Who else could it be?

~

A/N: A little disjointed and not exactly shipping, but honestly what I think about the matter of Shikako telling someone the truth?

Ooooohhhh! I really love this Starstruck stuff! Can you do a wander!lust team seven??? I really love the idea that after the war for a while they just want to… Be Together. Platonically. Like, Naruto’ all, I know I screamed about homage for the first half of my life but no thanks, maybe later (kakashi is so proud) And Kakashi can come to! If he isn’t too busy as Hokage. Maybe Sakura can take over for a bit.

😀

Wanderlust!team seven I can do, but just to clarify, anon: did you want wanderlust!team seven platonically or wanderlust!team seven in Waking Up Starstruck? Because Waking up Starstruck is my NaruKako series…

If you want a wanderlust!NaruKako platonic-to-romantic thing (with platonic Sasuke third wheeling it up) that’d be Waking Up Starstruck, if you want platonic!team seven nomadic badasses that would be… well, I’m not sure. Probably a Dreaming One Shot?

Waking Up Starstruck, (2016-10-10)

To this day, Naruto’s birthday is not really celebrated in the village, despite all the good he’s done for Konoha and the world at large. It’s nothing against him–not anymore–but the day of his birth still coincides with one of the biggest losses in Konoha’s history, and so long as there are living to remember them, the dead deserve to be mourned.

But after the somber memorial services held by their respective clans, Naruto’s friends have a small gathering. The dead deserve to be mourned and remembered, but the living are meant to live.

“Happy Birthday!” they cheer, the small ramen stand full to bursting with the majority of the most powerful teenagers on the planet.

Naruto is near to tears of joy–Lee is already there–which Kiba ribs him for before beginning a round of Hilarious Stories of Naruto Shenanigans. (Only within the past year, Sasuke, otherwise that’s cheating!)

It’s nice, it’s fun, it’s more than Naruto’s ever had before. And it would be perfect…

… if it weren’t missing a person

Months ago, after everything had been resolved–plots of world domination unraveled, ancient grudges finally laid to rest–Naruto thought things would be better.

Well, they were better–peace and a distinct lack of zombies couldn’t possibly be worse–but he thought things would… settle.

He knew his friends have also a hard time shaking off what they’ve seen and done, though as time passed they’ve mostly been able smooth out the worst of it. He’s been coping, too; properly, even, now that he has time to process things.

Except, months ago, Shikako left.

Every so often, Nagaoka will come to Konoha bearing coded reports, personal letters, and occasionally gifts from Shikako.

Glorified messenger hawk is not a proper use for a battle deer summon in training, but the young buck is always proud to do it, and easily bribed with salt licks. The letters are pleasant, but carefully worded–succinct paragraphs of understatements–and it’s easier to have Nagaoka tell them stories of his summoner instead.

In the days leading up to his birthday, Naruto is hoping for another visit from Nagaoka. He is only a little disappointed when he doesn’t show.

Night falls, and though shinobi aren’t exactly diurnal, everyone must go home or to work eventually–Ichiraku’s is a restaurant, after all, not a bar, and while the party could just relocate and continue, Naruto is more than happy with what’s been given to him already.

The air is cool, the stars are bright, and he’s another year older.

The five year old him could never have imagined something like today–friends celebrating his birthday–but that’s because five year old him hadn’t yet joined the Academy. Hadn’t yet met a girl with braided hair who invited him and included him and kept believing him even before he really began believing in himself.

He looks up at the night sky and wonders where Shikako is, hopes she is well and happy.

He still lives in the same apartment he did growing up–crappy and somewhat rundown as it is–though over the years it’s improved in terms of comfort and security.

When he walks through the door, he knows someone is in his apartment, but the seals are banked at their lowest, friendliest setting.

There aren’t many people who have been attuned to his security seals, and most of them have already said their goodbyes for the night.

The only one left is the one who created the seals.

“Happy Birthday, Naruto,” Shikako says, and Naruto really is crying tears of joy now.

~

A/N: I wanted to do a proper birthday thing for Naruto but I also haven’t slept in over forty hours so here’s this jumbled thing that my exhausted brain slow-churned out.

Stars Also Dream, 8/? (2016-10-09)

There is something to be said about the man who can, without any enhancing blood limit, become the head of T&I for a hidden village as large and as prosperous as Konoha. Ibiki is impressive: he’s patient and smart and–as the horrific scars from literal weeks of torture will attest to–so damned loyal; you know you’re lucky that he’s your best friend

He’s also stubborn and secretly sassy and an occasional pain in the ass.

“No,” Ibiki says, simply, as if you were asking him if he had any plans for the weekend and not, in actuality, telling him that you’re requesting yourself for a solo mission off-planet. Honestly, as if you’re being difficult–he’s let you get away with much worse.

“I’m the only one who is qualified for this,” you argue because factually this is true. Who else has all the relevant information, abilities, and history for this?

(Your daughter, maybe, has two out of the three, but you’d rather die than put one of your precious miracles in the Empire’s crosshairs.)

“No,” he repeats, walking ahead of you through the hallway, the tail of his silly overcoat flapping with every step. On either side of you, intel nin stop and stare or hastily bow, as if Ibiki were the Hokage herself and not the dork who, at seventeen, cried from too spicy curry and still picks corn out from a dish before eating it.

“But-”

“No.”

You’d smack him, but this is his place of work and you wouldn’t want to undermine his authority. Also, he’d take it as a sign that he’s winning.

Instead, you circle around to the front and stop, facing him with a watery-eyed pout. You know what you look like, with your small frame and pink blouse and wide eyes, and while Ibiki is far too familiar with you to fall for it, that doesn’t mean the other intel nin won’t.

Ibiki’s eyes narrow, irritated but reluctantly impressed, because he knows that he’s been outmaneuvered. Intel nin are–when it doesn’t concern work–absolute gossips, and the Head of T&I bullying the Jounin Commander’s wife is something that will easily make rounds.

He doesn’t sigh–Ibiki is much too controlled for that–but his mouth twists for a brief moment before he says, “My office, then.”

Which, in this case, basically means yes.

A lot goes on in Konoha that the Jounin Commander doesn’t know about. It’s not a slight against your husband or his capabilities, but considering the sheer number of shinobi, not to mention the many departments and their functions, it’d be impossible to expect one person to know about everything.

Of course, the Hokage is expected to do just that, but she has a retinue of department heads and commanders and assistants at her beck and call–delegation is a fantastic thing. In most cases, the Hokage keeps a loose leash on her underlings, trusting them to do their jobs to the best of their ability. In fact, its only in rare cases–such as your daughter’s genin team–that she gets involved in the minutiae of the shinobi under her command.

The existence of life on other planets no longer counts as minutiae.

Ibiki can keep some things secret from your husband: careful interpretation of jurisdiction motivated by the somewhat muted panic thrumming under your skin– 

(He’s always been able to read you just as well as you read him)

–but he won’t keep secrets from the Hokage: that way lies corruption.

You know quite well what results when corruption poisons a government.

But you’re still wary when you and Ibiki enter the Hokage’s office–a place you’ve not so much avoided as tried not to intrude upon–a hold over from your paranoid teenage years, so keenly aware of your status as an illegal alien… literally. You’re lucky Ibiki is letting you in on the meeting, never mind that you are the expert in this case, but your nerves are still wound tight.

“Figures,” Tsunade-sama says with a sigh, dropping her chin into her hand with almost elegant exasperation, “I knew your daughter had to have come by it naturally, and Nara aren’t exactly known for being harbingers of chaos.”

A slight exaggeration, but not wrong–the similarities between you and your daughter are legion.

“Go on,” she says, lazy wave of her other hand, “Let’s see how the original holds up in terms of bizarreness.”

It’s too fond to be insulting, and in this influx of memories from the past, you’re almost grateful for it. Grateful that your family has endeared themselves to the Hokage. Grateful for the way Tsunade-sama listens, analyzing yet understanding. Grateful for the way Ibiki stands beside you, as supportive and solid as always.

Grateful for the reminder of your present: you are a wife and a mother, a soldier and a friend, a shinobi of Konoha and proud to be all these things.

Ibiki doesn’t understand why you want to keep your past a secret from your family, but he respects your choice and helps you do so. To the rest of Konoha–to your family–this is just a short one-week mission for T&I, a routine check on a low priority contact in Land of Tea. Nothing risky at all–why would he ever put the Jounin Commander’s wife on a dangerous mission?

That being said, his leniency only goes so far, and both he and the Hokage refuse to let you go alone.

Your repeated argument, “I’m the only one qualified for this,” is soundly rebuffed with Tsunade-sama’s almost lazy, “Which is why you’re team leader. Now choose your second.”

Ibiki smirks–it doesn’t matter that it’s Tsunade-sama doing the arguing for him, he’s still winning. You try not to scowl.

And, well, you’re willing to accede to some extent that they may be right. Rescuing a princess from an evil empire isn’t exactly C-rank material, no matter that you’re mostly acting as observer and support to a Jedi master once renowned throughout the galaxy. You’re lucky they’re letting you go at all, really, but a threat to the planet is still a threat to Konoha and it’s true that you are the only one qualified to take point on this.

At least Ibiki isn’t trying to insert himself on the team–it’d make an obvious lie out of the cover, and for all that you’ve never done anything to him, you know he’s not immune to Force tricks.

Any shinobi worth their headband can keep up with a jedi physically and mentally, but when it comes to intangible matters of Force versus chakra, there’s only one obvious choice for this mission.

“I’ll need a Yamanaka,” you say, which is as much assent as Ibiki needs to begin working his weird powers of bureaucracy.

The both of you are summarily kicked out of the Hokage’s office; within the hour you are back at T&I with a newly released ragtag group of aliens and a bewildered Yamanaka chuunin.

Poor Santa-kun.

~

A/N: Okay, so I know I’m late by thirty minutes, but this totally counts because I didn’t want to have a third missed post in a row.

Ibiki and Tsunade’s reactions for @donapoetrypassion (still keeping it a secret from the twins for now, so none for them, sorry).

Santa Yamanaka is a jounin post time-skip, so @book14reader and I figured that he could be a chuunin pre time-skip who accidentally mentioned he wanted more experience to become jounin in front of the wrong person (ie Ibiki or, possibly, Anko) and got recruited onto the WEIRDEST MISSION EVER. Also, even without the Force immunity I’ve given the Yamanaka clan, if you’re going to put the Nara clan head’s wife on a dangerous mission, the best people to put on her team would be a Nara, Akimichi, or Yamanaka anyway because they’ll do damn near anything to make sure she comes back safely.

hereyougo-moretrash:

Little Kareru and Shikako! At first it seemed a little too domestic for her, so I made the book on sealing. Problem solved! @jacksgreysays

(LOOK AT HIS LITTLE FACE! HE’S SO CUUTE!

No, Shikako, don’t teach a toddler how to do Touch Blast. Don’t do it.)

Baby Grows Up, a Kareru Uzumaki ficlet (2016-10-05)

Every year on his birthday (or, rather, the day Mum found him) Kareru’s aunts and uncles hold a tournament.

Supposedly it’s to see who his favorite is–he knows better than to actually answer that question–but Kareru thinks it’s just an excuse to hang out with each other. Or maybe “excuse” is the wrong word, it makes it sound like a bad thing; maybe “reason” would be better.

Every year on his birthday all the people he loves gather together and there’s nothing bad about that.

“I’m thinking about growing my hair out,” Kareru says, tugging on the red strands that brush against his ears. He is the Uzumaki clan head, a recent genin, and simultaneously thirteen years old and somewhere in his forties. Maybe fifties.

“Oh, yeah?” Mirai asks, pulling on her own long dark locks. They curl around her fingers and cling like little tendrils–to her fingers and, from the leaves and twigs in her hair, everything else, “I’ve been thinking of cutting mine.”

“I’ll do it if you do,” Kareru promises, reaching out with his pinky extended.

Mirai blinks at him before smiling, matches him and intertwines their pinkies.

Kareru will remember this moment for the rest of his life.

People expect a lot from him, he knows, even people he’s never met.

He’s a bit famous–not to be vain–given who his parents are and the circumstances of his birth (or, rather, finding). And not to mention, he’s been communally raised by a group of shinobi who can individually be called impressive and collectively be considered overkill.

He has a good foundation to build from, the best foundation it could be said–again, not to be vain–and so he knows that the expectations on him aren’t entirely unfair.

He’s not going to be the Sage of Six Paths come again. He’s not going to be the Uzukage, resurrecting–figuratively, of course–the fallen village of Uzushio. He’s not going to single-handedly revolutionize the field of fuinjutsu and usher in an era of prosperity and peace on top of the already prosperous and peaceful existence the world is currently enjoying.

Kareru won’t live up to everybody’s expectations, certainly not those expectations, but it’s nice to think that people think he can. The fact that people think that of him, even if those are exaggerations and extremes, is only because in some way they believe in him.

And even if he doesn’t know what he wants to do yet, it’s still nice to be believed in.

Baa-chan teaches him how to cook, how to lie with a smile, and how to flip backwards into a one handed handstand and kick someone in the face all in one smooth movement.

Surprisingly, all three things save his life. Even more surprisingly, it’s all during the same mission.

TenTen-oba… er, that is, TenTen-sensei, stares at him, hands on her hips, with an expression he’s seen her give Mum before: confused, but reluctantly impressed.

“We’re not even Team Seven,” she says, as she signals for Mirai to tie up the prisoner and Shachi to secure the perimeter, “I didn’t think this would be a problem,” she sounds even a little bit irritated–but her hands are gentle when she checks the stab wound on his shoulder, and so he knows she’s mostly just worried.

“Sorry,” he says, hissing in pain as she tugs the kunai out, and sticks a healing tag on the wound. One of her inventions together with Sakura-oba–translating the Mystical Palm jutsu into seals–something he’s been meaning to ask her to teach him.

“Don’t apologize,” Mirai says, having finished tying up the prisoner thoroughly and with a knockout tag to boot, “It’s not your fault,” she says pointedly in Shachi’s direction, who looks away with reddening cheeks.

“It’s nobody’s fault,” TenTen-sensei says, helping Kareru to his feet once the healing tag has run its course, “Although I’m sure your father will tell me otherwise.”

Kareru doesn’t know what TenTen-sensei and Tou-chan have against each other–something to do with how much of a bastard he was as a genin, Dad will say–but he has long since learned how to capitalize on it.

“I won’t tell him if you teach me the healing tag,” he says with a wide grin. He can fix the hole in his shirt and wash away the blood easily, it’s the lying that will be difficult: Tou-chan does have the Sharingan, after all, and he has years of interpreting Mum’s carefully crafted understatements.

But Baa-chan did teach him how to lie with a smile and that’s one thing Kareru learned better than Mum.

Mum isn’t around a lot–traveling and researching and (though he knows he’s not supposed to know) maintaining her part of Konoha’s extensive spy network–which makes the time she is around all the more precious.

“Kareru!” she calls out, before he can get within five feet of her. He knows he’ll never really be able to sneak up on her–her sensor abilities and his chakra capacity making the very idea impossible–but he likes to try anyway. She’s not angry or annoyed by it, gladly accepting the hug he gives her and even tolerating the way he lifts her off the ground for a moment.

She’s still taller than him–which some part of him is relieved by, never mind that he’s outgrown both of his dads–but she’s thin in his arms, light and easy to carry. He wonders if she’s been eating enough out on the road all alone, and he finds the thought infinitely sad.

This is a part of growing up.

When he was a toddler, Kareru got to be Hokage for a day.

Not really, of course. It was mostly Kaka-jii-chan letting him play with the Hokage’s hat and draw on no doubt terribly important documents, but it’s one of Kareru’s earliest memories. The view from the Hokage’s desk as shinobi come and bow and speak and leave, the entire village spreading out from the tower like ripples from a fallen object.

It’s a nice memory, but Kareru knows he doesn’t want it to happen again. He loves Konoha, it’s his home even if he wasn’t born here, but Hokage for one day is enough for him.

~

A/N: A bunch of random snippets in Kareru’s life because, I dunno, I didn’t have much direction here, @captainlibrarynerdstuff. But it was fun to write nonetheless and I think I’m getting a better idea of what Kareru is like as a person.

Also, because I say so, Shachi is Shachi Umino aka Iruka’s nonexistent child with… I dunno? Someone? I dunno. I built an entire backstory for Shachi even though he’s hardly in this, but basically he ends up having the Mokuton because I say so… but also because I head canon that Iruka is somehow related to the Senju (which is why he looks so goddamn much like Hashirama, I know it’s mostly same face art from Kishimoto, but let me have this) via his mother and then I had to come up with a Senju line so it’s probably something like…

Shachi Umino, son of Iruka Umino, son of Kohari Umino nee Senju, cousin of Tsunade Senju via Harigane Senju (who I made up) who is siblings with one of Tsunade’s parents (who don’t exist at all?!) and thus child of Hashirama Senju and Mito Uzumaki. So Shachi is the great great grandson of Hashirama and Mito.

Basically, TenTen’s team have super prestigious pedigrees and she’s the long-suffering herder of these overpowered cats. She thought she’d avoid the craziness by it being Team Nine instead of Team Seven, but then she remembers that she was Team Nine and her team had Gai, Lee, and Neji so… (she doesn’t realize that someone who can create Hammerspace as a teenager should also be considered impressive, but she likes the idea that she’s normal too much to abandon it).