Fake Fic Title: moral compass (says stand up, shake it off). Never Lookin’ To Come Back. p.s. all these brainstorms are so good

Immediately from the title, I’m thinking this is a Sasuke!B-side of the Never Lookin’ To Come Back ‘verse. Like, what kind of shit has he gone through after his planet was destroyed? And then growing up as part of the Organization and going on black op missions up until he winds up on the Shuumatsu…

Sasuke’s moral compass is not exactly one for giving up, clearly. It may not always guide him in the right direction, but it at least makes him keep going. Which… I mean, was a disaster in canon, but can be a good thing so long as someone else points him in the right direction.

This is where Kakashi would show up in this ‘verse. As the one who “rescued” Sasuke by putting him in the Organization (so that Danzo couldn’t get him) he’d feature prominently in Sasuke’s past–whether as himself or as Agent Wolf–and maybe he’s the one who runs interference between ROOT and Shuumatsu the more they get involved with the politics of Senju vs Danzo.

I wonder what Sasuke’s opinion on the Shuumatsu crew is. Even before Neji and Hinata show up, that is–though the Hyuuga chancellor’s missing daughter and her first cousin is pretty interesting. Like, he definitely knows that Shino–the nameless Teacher of the Will of Fire–is the grandson of the Aburame chancellor. He probably knows that Shikako Heijo is in fact Shikako Nara, the Nara moon minister’s daughter. He probably also knows that–while the Inuzuka have been hit hard by the war–Kiba is the alpha’s son.

… I don’t think he knows about Naruto mostly because NOBODY is supposed to know about Naruto. (Except, you know, Kakashi and Jiraiya, probably)… and I don’t know if I want to go with my once-considered idea of TenTen actually being Danzo’s granddaughter via a disowned/runaway child but Sasuke definitely doesn’t know that, either.

The point is, Sasuke knows many secrets about the crew that they don’t necessarily know about each other and he lives in their starboard shuttle enjoying the entertainment. Obviously, he helps out when it’s needed, but he doesn’t volunteer his aid. Given his own adolescence of watching masked people return to The Org’s HQ and make jokes about assassinating people or disclosing their for various crimes, Sasuke finds the shenanigans the Shuumatsu crew get up to absolutely hilarious.

Of course, once the Hyuuga cousins show up and Ino points them in the direction of Tsunade, it starts to get much less fun. He’s not going to bail–the reason for which has less to do with him getting the Shuumatsu as his official mission, and more to do with how he’s actually fond of the crew–but now he’s got to defend the closest thing to home he’s had since ROOT destroyed his planet.


Ask Box Event Still Open!

Never Lookin’ To Come Back + Meeting up with the Ino-Shika-Cho?

Okay, anon, thanks for waiting. This doesn’t quite fill the prompt but it is related so… author’s cut? Anyway, enjoy!


When you join the brown coats, your past doesn’t matter. Who you were–who you used to be–where you came from? That doesn’t mean anything.

Everyone has secrets from their past.

The only thing that matters when you wear that brown coat is what you believe.


Akimichi has two moons, Nara and Yamanaka, both as important to the Alliance as their planet.

Also like their planet, the moons are ruled by respective clans, though by title they are ministers not chancellors.

The current Nara minister has two sons.

No one mentions anything about a daughter.


They’re on the moon of Nohara–closer to the Core than either Kiba or the captain like, tension high in their shoulders, the slightest misstep enough to make Akamaru growl–when Shino comes back with a passenger.

It’s not unusual for Shino to bring back passengers–given how long the Teacher as been on the ship, he’s practically a crew member by this point, never mind that he pays them–but this passenger isn’t the same as the others.

She’s got a wicked smile on her face for one–instead of the typical serene blankness of other practitioners of the Will of Fire–and she even has a last name.

A worryingly recognizable last name.

“We already have the Hyuuga chancellor’s missing daughter and her asshole of a cousin, I don’t see how anyone could be a bigger risk than that,” Kiba grouses, voices contained to the engine room for that extra privacy.

TenTen wasn’t exactly happy at being kicked out of her domain, but she hadn’t argued at the look on the captain’s face.

“We don’t exactly need word of that getting around to the Core, now do we?” Shikako snipes back, but it’s a moot point. Whether or not they take Yamanaka as a passenger, her keen eyes have already spotted the telltale features of one Hyuuga who normally wouldn’t be caught dead on a bucket of rust and bolts like this.

Kiba bares his teeth, “Why are you lying to me?”


In the system, the captain’s name is Shikako Heijo; the same name she used to sign up with the brown coats.

Why would it be anything else?


Kiba and the captain stomp out of the engine room towards the cargo hold where Shino and their potential passenger are politely chatting as if they were having a tea party and not surrounded by graffitied crates of dubious content, instead.

“We’re not heading any closer to the Core than this,” Shikako says, practically throwing down a gauntlet for the Yamanaka minister’s daughter.

“What a coincidence,” she says, smile gleaming and sharp, “neither am I.”

Kiba doesn’t understand why that makes Shikako bristle something fierce, but he’s still pretty annoyed by all the sidestepping. She was never half as resistant to the Hyuuga bastard on their ship, and as far as he knows, Yamanaka is going to leave after one trip.

Or at least he hopes so, they’re flying a ship, not running a halfway house.

She turns to him, hackles raised, “Your passenger, your problem,” she says before stomping away again.

Kiba huffs in response, off balance and unwilling to show it. “So where are you heading to, then?” he asks, because if he’s going to get some cargo on this boat then he ought to know where they’re headed.

Yamanaka’s smile has dimmed, shrunk into something soft and sad, eyes following after the captain. “The Katou moon,” she answers, “I’m looking for someone.”

Kiba shrugs, “Hey, we don’t need to know why you’re going, we just have to get you there.”


As it turns out, knowing who Yamanaka was looking for would have been welcomed information.

After all, it’s hard to stay beneath the ROOT’s radar when you’re on the trail of the last Senju.


A/N: No Chouji or Shikamaru, sorry, but I figure Chouji wouldn’t really be able to leave planet Akimichi considering he is the heir and the whole twin meeting would be an entirely separate ordeal. And I more wanted to get into the set up of why the Ino-Shika-Cho aren’t on the ship.

Check out the Ask Box Author’s Cut event!

946. ‘You and I will never / be a great love story. / That’s ok! / Let’s see what kind / of story we’ll be. / (Oooh! Oooh! I hope it’s science fiction!)’ KibaxShikako

You and I will never be a great love story.
That’s okay!
Let’s see what kind of story we’ll be.
(Oooh! Oooh! I hope it’s science fiction!)

(Never Lookin’ To Come Back)

“Again?” Shikako says, stepping out from the shadowed cover of the ship, “You don’t get hazard pay for starting a fight with a bunch of civilians.”

Kiba’s hackles don’t quite rise–never against her, not after what they’ve been through–but he does scowl something fierce, “It’s my shore leave, cap’n, I can spend it how I want.”

Akamaru, the traitor, wags his tail at the sight of her, whining a plaintive request to stop this whole disaster in the making.

“And what are you doing bringing Akamaru?” she asks, crouching down to scrub at his ears, “They don’t serve ninken on this rock, and it’s not fair to make him clean up your mess when he can’t even have fun, too.”

Akamaru barks an agreement.

“Get on back inside,” she says to him, head jerking toward the gangway, “I’ll deal with this idiot.”

He goes, claws clacking against the metal of the ramp as he heads back inside the ship.

Shikako stands up, meeting Kiba’s eyes in a familiar way that almost makes him want to bare his throat, “I’m not here to lecture you.”

“Sure feels like it.”

She rolls her eyes, “Come on,” she says, walking away, the tails of her long brown coat flapping behind her, “let’s get drunk and fight some Rooters.”

There’s a difference between being a part of Konoha and being a Rooter: the first is like a pair of shoes, too tight and constantly chafing, blisters forming, and yet unable to take them off.

The second is a knife to the back.

They’re not the same, and of course the latter is far worse, but it’s terribly easy to stab someone if they can’t run away, isn’t it?

On the bucket of bolts that is their ship, there are the following:

Two “reformed” brown coats whose ferry and delivery service may or may not include smuggling contraband.

Two mercenaries for hire who have never so much as killed a single person between them and have accidentally inspired, on more than one occasion, cult followings about their heroic deeds.

One mechanic from a far off moon who swears that no matter how talented she is, the ship is going to crash without a replacement grav unit, she means it this time.

One Organization member who rents the starboard shuttle and might be a high class escort or possibly an assassin, the jury’s still out on that one.

One Teacher of the Will of Fire who knows a suspicious amount about the inner workings of Konoha and is far more connected than a man who has given up his last name should be.

And one ninken who is way too skilled at opening locked doors, that food’s not for you, damnit Akamaru, spit it out.

On a somewhat fairly routine smuggle and ferry, their number goes up by two.

The four core planets of Konoha were Aburame, Akimichi, Hyuuga, and Uchiha.

During the Uprooting, the planet of Uchiha was destroyed, the blame pinned on the rebellion.

Whether they believed it or not, the tragedy galvanized the other three core planets into putting their full power behind bringing a swift end to the war…

… and Root, the jingoist half of what remains of the Senju Administration, filled the gap of the fourth power in Konoha.

“Go get me some passengers,” Shikako commands, waving an imperious hand out towards the town they’ve landed near. It’d be more impressive if she weren’t curled over face down on the table, awkwardly trying to eat porridge without lifting her head.

Regardless, it’s not exactly a new or surprising sight, not after the years of being her XO and the year before that of being her lieutenant. Still funny as hell, but not unexpected.

“Aye, aye, cap’n,” Kiba shoots back, not moving from his seat whatsoever. Akamaru huffs a doggy laugh, nosing upward for some rehydrated meat substance.

“I have to get some parts,” TenTen says, ignoring their captain’s disgraceful posture and petulant groaning, “I think I can make do with the current rotator belt, but the grav unit won’t survive another atmo crossing, captain.”

Shikako grunts.

“And I’m running low on duct tape,” TenTen adds, which, apparently, makes the request of vital importance: the credits are dispensed immediately.

“Lee, go with her. Now everyone leave me alone, I’m trying to eat.”

Four hours later, Naruto returns with a small herd of passengers practically throwing money at him–thankfully, after Kiba already stowed the contraband away, otherwise that’d be a disaster–and Lee and TenTen return with a different grav unit, a crate of duct tape, and a suspiciously posh looking man with suspiciously large luggage looking for a quick and discrete way off the planet who is willing to pay five times the rate. Suspiciously.

“We need the money,” Shikako mutters.

“I’m not saying we don’t,” Kiba argues, “I’m just saying that we definitely don’t need the trouble that comes with it.”

“Oh, now you’re worried about trouble?” she asks, a sardonic eyebrow raised.

“This is a different kind of trouble,” he says, nose wrinkling, “I can smell it.”

“How bad can it be?”

The daughter of the chancellor of the planet Hyuuga is missing.

Kidnapped, all official reports say.

It is a very bad kind of trouble.


A/N: Presenting the brand new ‘verse, Never Lookin’ To Come Back, a FireflyxDoS fusion featuring a Kiba/Shikako relationship that can be romantic or platonic–it’s up to the readers to decide for themselves.

So… the ratio of Kiba/Shikako to worldbuilding perhaps wasn’t the highest it could have been, but I got carried away with trying to adapt the Firefly ‘verse into a fusion with DoS. Which I think is totally an acceptable excuse?

Anyway, what should I name the spaceship?

Number + Character/Ship + (optional) AU –> my ask box

[If anyone else wants to do a softer world prompt that isn’t on the list, you can just send the page id number for the original comic instead.]