Fake Fic Summaries, 22/? the Wolfworld edition (2017-09-25)

A/N: So speaking of having binge-watched all of Westworld while embroidering…

Apparently there’s no Teen Wolf crossover/fusion (or, at least, not on ao3)? Which I am greatly surprised by considering how PERFECT it would be.

And not even going with the whole “western historical fiction” thing (which I could do since ~Sheriff’s son~) but just the idea of theme parks with realistic androids and, I mean… there are a bunch of different parks, so maybe in one there is a “21st century small town with ~magical monsters~”



Stiles already knows there’s something wrong with him–maze-like thoughts and a tendency towards disarray–but that doesn’t mean there isn’t also something wrong with this world.

He just hasn’t found the answer. Yet.

Or, Stiles is on the verge of consciousness and Derek’s family has a controlling interest in the park.

I wouldn’t want to do an exact one to one cut and paste since… that’d be boring… but I guess as a more “equivalent role” of sorts here’s a list of which character I would match with which. I kind of think that, except for the Argents who are also involved in running the park, all the humans (or originally-humans) are probably hosts.

Stiles is Dolores (and, sort of, Charlie)
Sheriff Stilinski as Abernathy
Scott as Teddy
Derek as William (but Peter as The Man In Black)
(Jennifer as Ben?)
Lydia as Maeve (Jackson as Clementine?)
Erica, Boyd, and Isaac as Lawrence/Hector/Armistice
Claudia as Bernard
Deaton as Ford (Morrell as Elsie?)
Chris as Theresa
Allison as Ashley Stubbs (Head of Security)
(Gerard/Kate as Charlotte?)
(Malia as Felix?)

Uh… so, yeah, as I said… this is very much so a loose translation.

The idea is that Deaton and Claudia were the original creators of the hosts and the parks. Before or during construction, Claudia’s son died (as well as her husband?) and so she made copies of them that would live forever.

Except, well, obviously that isn’t a long-term solution and it ends poorly (unsure if in mass death and assisted suicide) but she gives Stiles the keys to consciousness before that as a final goodbye.

A few years later, the park is in financial trouble, but luckily a young Peter Hale goes to the park, has the time of his life–involving awful things to Lydia and Stiles in particular–and decides to invest heavily in it to the point where whenever a Hale visits, whatever they want, they get.

(At this point I have a weird idea about Malia being conceived during this? Like… Peter has sex with someone who he thinks is a host but is very much not. I’m thinking… Paige? And because that’s scandalous, Paige goes to the park, gives birth, and leaves Malia there. She’s raised by hosts for a while until the whole “looping storyline” thing becomes an issue and then she just starts working for the park as one of the repairers.)

A couple decades later, the park’s internal politics have changed greatly. The Argents see Deaton as an overly cerebral, unmarketable old man and some of the hosts are starting to act a little strange. Derek, as a Hale representative, is sent to reassert their controlling interest over the Argents (without implicitly backing Deaton whose motivations are vague at best) and investigate what the hell is going on. (In this ‘verse, the Argents and Hales have been constantly battling for greater influence over the park. They are rival corporate empires whose only joint venture is the park).

Within the park, all the hosts are on loops. Again, unsure if this would be a “21st century with magical monsters” or a “western historical fiction” but either work? Stiles as the Sheriff’s mischievous son, Scott as his endearing best friend with the main quest, Lydia as the queen bee who rules the town, Erica/Boyd/Isaac as the outsiders/outlaws who guests have to go out of their way to interact with.

Um. But… yeah.

Very short and abstract since mostly I’m surprised no one’s done a fusion yet…

A Little Danger (A Lot Stranger), 1/? (2016-08-31)

In hindsight, Stiles could understand how his actions might be interpreted a certain way.

But when has hindsight ever helped him?

“I think he’s a werewolf,” Stiles says, eyes narrowed and following the, admittedly, hot-like-burning possibly-a-werewolf browsing through the shelves of Beacon Hills’ comic book store unimaginatively named Comics and Stuff.

Erica snorts and rolls her eyes, giving minute tweaks to the expensive figurines in the glass case even though there’s nothing wrong with the way Stiles set them up. She just likes to exert dominance over him by redoing his work. It’s disgustingly successful, the boss is considering giving her a promotion (but no raise because haha, as if. Comic book stores don’t make money anymore since people can just buy things online instead).

“You could just ask him out like a normal person–oh wait,” she pauses, “you aren’t a normal person.”

Stiles scowls. “Yellow makes you look jaundiced,” he snipes then–because he does have some self-preservation–darts away frantically.

Right into the solid wall of probably-a-werewolf’s muscular chest.

Stiles kind of bounces off him like the least aerodynamic rubber ball in existence and only gets saved from collapsing to the ground in an ungainly heap of limbs because definitely-a-werewolf manages to snag his wrist and tether him upright.

“Holy inferiority complex, Batman!” Stiles yelps, because why make only one reference when he can do two simultaneously?

Hot Werewolf tilts his head in a way that shouldn’t be cute considering his whole molten-sexuality-vibe going on, confused but curious–which is one of the more positive reactions Stiles has gotten in the face of his… everything.

In response, Stiles just stares like a gormless idiot. Hot Werewolf has really nice eyes.

Erica coughs, swooping in to save him, “Do you need help with anything?” She asks checking out Hot Werewolf blatantly.

Never mind, she’s obviously swooping in to do something other than save Stiles from himself.

Hot Werewolf turns toward her, “Just need to pay for this,” he says, holding up a Superman t-shirt in his left hand. His right hand is still wrapped around Stiles’ wrist.

Shit, he can probably feel how fast his pulse is going.

“Sure thing,” Erica says, leaning forward with a smirk in a combination that Stiles has actually seen her practice before, and then, bizarrely, she steps away? “I have to go shelve the Catwoman serials, but Stiles here can help you with that.”

“I can?” He asks, uselessly, to Erica’s retreating back as she heads in the complete opposite direction of where the DC serials are. “I-I mean, yeah, definitely, I can totally help you with that, dude,” he amends, doing his best to get to the cash register while his wrist is still being held hostage by Hot Werewolf.

“Don’t call me dude,” Hot Werewolf argues, but amenably follows Stiles’ lead. “My name’s Derek,” he adds, while Stiles rings up the t-shirt.

Hot Werewolf–Derek–is apparently the kind of person to give exact change. Stiles tries not to fumble the coins too badly, but even with two hands now, he can feel the pressure of Derek’s gaze.

“Thanks for shopping at Comics and Stuff,” Stiles says by rote as he hands over Derek’s receipt. “Come again soon.”

“I’m sure I will,” Derek smirks, teeth bright and sharp and thrilling.

It’s not until the door chime jingles sadly that Stiles takes a shaky breath.

“Wow,” Erica says, “I practically gift-wrapped that for you. You should be making out with him right now. Like, up against that shelf right there.”

And because Stiles has no idea how to respond to that, he ignores it and says instead, “He’s definitely a werewolf.”


A/N: I was discussing food allergies with my sister and had a weird thought and then it turned into this so…

I thought I was going to be able to do it all in one shot but its approaching midnight so apparently this is going to be a multi-parter.

Fake Fic Summaries 2/?, The Play It Again edition (2015-07-05)

These two “fake fic summaries” are really more like fake fic titles. I guess this is kind of a cross-post, too, since I’m really just rehashing a rant I had on my lj a while ago. In response to metisket’s WONDERFUL Teen Wolf fic, Play It Again. So really, this post is just SUPER derivative all around. Hooray!

So, if you haven’t read that fic. Seriously, go read it. This post will undoubtedly have spoilers and be nowhere near as fabulous as the fic in question. If you’re still here for some reason, then let me present to you today’s fake fic, aka fic that I would love to read/write and etc, as it relates to metisket’s Play It Again.

Here are the TWO fake fic titles:

Play It Again (There’s Always Tomorrow Remix)


Play It Again (You’ll Never Get To Heaven Remix)

Because, if I’m going to be derivative about these fake fics, I might as well give credit where it’s due, right? The thing is, neither of these are really remix fics per se (or at least, what I understand to be remix fics), but I just like the way they sound.

Here’s the premise for metisket’s Play It Again which would be necessary to understand for the fake fics. Stiles jumps into an alternate universe via a ~mysterious~ Hale artifact which sends the soul of the wearer into a compatible body such that they can better protect/aid the Hale family. Derek gave that pendant to Stiles. Before Stiles, the wearer was Derek’s older brother, Philip.

The “There’s Always Tomorrow Remix” would be a prequel/side story of sorts, and is actually about one of metisket’s OC Hale characters, Philip Hale–aka Derek’s older brother and the only human born to the Hale wolf pack. In the fic, Stiles briefly wonders what happened to his universe’s Philip since he was wearing the pendant the night of the Hale House fire. But because Stiles is a little bit sociopathic, he drops the matter and goes on with protecting the few people he actually cares about.

Unlike Stiles, I AM CURIOUS AS FUCK as to what happened to Philip. And… don’t need to protect any of my friends/family from supernatural disasters so…

But, I digress. In “There’s Always Tomorrow Remix” the fic follows original universe Philip on his journey throughout multiple alternate universes as he tries and fails to figure out why his family (and therefore he) keep getting burned to death. I like the horrifying potential for the most depressing and frustrating Groundhog Day on earth where he keeps getting shunted into different realities in which he keeps dying horribly and can’t figure out for the life of him why. I mean, we know it’s because of Kate Argent, but the way the Hale family missed her creepy molester act on Derek the first time means it’ll take a while for Philip to get to that conclusion.

At some point he either does figure it out–but, as the remix title suggests, not on his own (yeah, it’s a reference to the song Lean On Me). In Play It Again, Deaton and Philip are close enough such that Philip designed Deaton wards and they’re comfortable discussing various magical matters. Maybe not quite friends or mentor relationship, but close enough. Also in PIA, Stiles is ridiculously magically powerful. Whether or not Philip gets help from yet another pendant-wielding alternate Stiles or actually a child who just happens to have crazy amounts of magical potential Stiles or even Claudia Stilinski (who I personally think would be the parent from whom Stiles inherits his magical ability), Philip manages to figure out what’s going down and stop it. And stop dying. Hooray for him!

Here’s a tiny ass snippet/possible fake fic summary for it:

You are Philip Hale. You are a human born to a pack of werewolves. You can do magic. You can do anything. You can do this.

“I can’t do this,” you say to yourself, tugging at your hair in frustration. The vigorous motion knocks your glasses askew and the scribbled rune-work in your notebook becomes even more useless.

“I’m majoring in library science. I volunteer at the vet clinic on the weekends. I don’t know anything about stopping a mass murder.”

The “You’ll Never Get To Heaven Remix,” a reference to the Dionne Warwick song, is an exploration of the Sterek ship through the Play It Again lens. Which, perhaps, does not make much sense, so I will explain. Play It Again, for all that it’s a story about a boy crossing universes and fighting monsters (of the human and creature variety) with magic and saving the day, is really a character study of Stiles. It throws Stiles into a bunch of situations, shows how he reacts to them, and shows how other people react to his reactions (mostly confusion). There are some internal musings, but for the most part Stiles is very goal-oriented in PIA and so doesn’t let himself stop to wonder about certain matters.

At the end, though, after all the action/adventure part of the story is over, Laura asks Stiles if he was in love with his original Derek. And, really, you should read that fic because his response was so very elquently poignant that it got me wondering about the almost Sterek in the original universe.

Stiles’ answer basically amounts to: he didn’t yet, he could have, and he maybe wanted to. And it’s almost like you can taste that lost potential love. And I have to wonder if any of that was at all reciprocated on Derek’s side. Because the fact that he even gave Stiles his family’s magical pendant and, sure, maybe he assumed it was a human-only thing but he still gave one of the last remnants of his family to Stiles. That speaks of something right there.

An aching, potential, something that grips my heart and squeezes because it ends with death and alternate realities and mourning and not-quite-regret but something similar. Because even in canon they always risked their own safety to save each others’ lives. They would die for each other, had died for each other (at least Derek had), but they didn’t necessarily love each other (yet or maybe never) and there’s something poetic and forceful about that. A deeper connection than the implied romance with the alternate Derek that Stiles gets.

And also, while it would push it almost too far into the alternate reality of an alternate reality, I kind of have to wonder if Stiles hadn’t definitively known his Derek had died. Because PIA ends with Stiles staying in the alternate reality since basically everyone else in his original reality is dead. He wasn’t super sure about his dad or Scott (but there had been a sort of vision/dream sequence which implied death), but he had actually witnessed Derek dying. Confirmed dead Derek. But… I kind of feel like Stiles would have worked harder to get back to his original universe if Derek were alive, or even possibly alive. At the very least, I think Stiles would consider that too. 

The way I see it, Stiles would consider it his duty to keep his dad and Scott safe, but ultimately his self worth means he would think their lives are better without him. But Derek? Stiles knows Derek’s life is better because of Stiles. Or at least, Derek is alive thanks to Stiles. Subconsciously, being needed by Derek would be a greater motivation for Stiles to get back than his perceived duty to his dad and Scott. And maybe Stiles would ponder on that as his relationship with alt!Derek grows, because even if Stiles and original!Derek hadn’t been romantically involved they were mutual life savers which is a stronger bond than what he has with alt!Derek even without the possible unresolved emotional tension.

Basically, a lot of feels.

I actually think second POV would work for this fake fic too. But very disjointed, time-skippy sections.

The related lj post is here. For anyone curious enough to read my stream of conscious of what I basically rehashed above.

Word Prompts (W17): Wedding

They first meet each other in a wedding dress boutique. It’s not too strange, really, considering Laura owns the store–meaning, by default, Derek works there. Despite his responsibilities being primarily in inventory, Derek does occasionally interact with the clients. Generally against his will, considering he’s been hit on by far too many bridesmaids and mothers of the brides, but he does meet people at the store.

No, what’s strange is that they meet each other while Stiles is trying on wedding dresses.

It’s one of the livelier appointments for sure, Derek can hear the cheers and laughter all the way in the stock room. And wedding dresses are excellent insulation.

Six impressively tall and broad women– “Amazons,” Peter remarks, before Cora swats his shoulder and shoos him toward a different group of frankly predatory looking septuagenarians (a fiftieth anniversary renewal of the vows sort of thing, which makes the bridal party eager to relive their youth)– have appropriated two of the store’s couches and three ottomans. Malia, squeezed between two of the brightly colored and sequin-adorned ladies, looks especially out of place with her day-off casual clothes.

But Derek doesn’t see any of this in person until fifty minutes into the appointment, when Laura sends him for the fifth time to the stock room for yet another batch of options. Each trip he’s brought back at least two dresses, so he’s getting pretty annoyed with this particular bride. On top of that is Peter’s flock of distinguished hens and Cora’s excitable group of sorority bridesmaids, so that’s almost ten trips with over twenty dresses. Sure he’s strong, but wedding dresses are heavy, okay?

“Derek!” And there’s Laura’s voice again.

“What is it this time?” Derek mutters behind a pile of white chiffon and lace. Laura will hear him anyway.

“Are those the Lazaro and Maggie Sottero A-lines?” She asks, spots the labels on the hangers, then begins to drag him to the front room.

He hates the front room, so he lets his heels dig in a little, but Laura is the epitome of an older sister who always gets her way.

“Ladies!” She calls out cheerfully, perhaps a little maniacally. This group, while not as melodramatic as appointments in the past, is certainly on the more rambunctious side. Malia’s shameless heckling does not help in the slightest, “Look at what my baby brother Derek has brought us!”

The women give a raucous cheer, appreciation in equal parts for the dresses and for the ‘fine specimen of rugged handsomeness’. His scowl does nothing to deter the blush or the catcalls that follow.

It’s at that point that he turns–if it weren’t for the fact that each of the dresses in his arms were worth over ten grand each and that Laura would possibly, literally kill him, he would have dropped them in shock.

They first meet each other in a wedding dress boutique; Derek, bullied into being a gopher and a distraction simultaneously, and Stiles standing on the raised platform, resplendent in white.


A/N: I don’t actually have any idea as to what happens next? Probably some kind of rom-com misunderstanding wherein Derek, understandably, thinks Stiles is going to get married (and thus is unavailable for dating) while Stiles thinks Derek is straight (and thus un-attracted to actual Stiles, a decidedly male drag princess who for reasons unknown to me at this point, has to try on various wedding dresses for the Jungle drag queens’ amusement).


Also… I only now realize that Peter’s “Amazons” comment might actually be on point considering that the club the drag queens frequent is called the Jungle. Like, they may actually call themselves Amazons? I dunno. And well, obviously if his daughter is friends with Stiles, she’s probably friends with them as well. So Peter would know…