shikako’s guide to deliquency & milatary insurrection, shikako+mikoto, 28) things you said but not out loud

Shikako Nara’s Guide To Delinquency and Military Insurrection, 28) things you said but not out loud

The girl is from the future. The future of a different dimension, she is quick to clarify, before going into a somewhat rambling and convoluted explanation of paradoxes and time travel.

Kushina, for all that she graduated from the Academy dead last, seems to pick it up immediately nodding along and asking questions about fuinjutsu techniques and something called causal stability conditions and relativistic spacetime. Hizashi doesn’t understand anymore than Mikoto, thankfully, but he appears to be content to just accept it as fact.

“She isn’t ROOT,” he dismisses with an affable shrug–a statement they had already confirmed by seeing the pile of corpses the girl had left behind, “And she looks… familiar enough that I’m certain she is also telling the truth.”

Mikoto frowns, “Just because she’s telling the truth doesn’t mean we can automatically trust her. ROOT soldiers is one thing, killing Danzo is another.”

Hizashi raises an eyebrow at her, “We don’t exactly have the luxury to turn away allies, even if she might not be as skilled as she claims.”

Mikoto bites back a surly response, surely no one could be as skilled as the girl claims, settling instead for a suspicious stare. Precaution as much as indulging her paranoia–the stare from an Uchiha is equivalent to an unsheathed blade from anyone else.

But she ends up not needing it, at least for the following days they travel with the girl, headed toward Land of Rain. The girl–Shikabane, she introduces herself with a resigned sigh–tells them what she knows of the organization called Akatsuki the current ruling force of the Land of Rain and how they, too, had a grudge against Danzo. How they, at least in the dimension she came from, welcomed missing nin–especially those formerly from Konoha. How they were led by an Uzumaki.

But she cautions them about their awful deeds. Their worrying ambition. “They went after the jinchuuriki,” she says, mindfully not looking at any of them. Still, Mikoto and her teammates exchange glances, “But they can’t go out of order, so you should be safe for a while… and hopefully the common goal of killing Danzo will be enough to divert their attentions.

“And plus,” Shikabane continues, as if she weren’t giving back and forth warning and reassurances, “Danzo did more to cause war and suffering than any other single person in history so that, at least, is in line with their original dream.”

“Have you worked with them before?” Hizashi asks.

Shikabane hesitates, “Not… this particular iteration, no.”

Mikoto asks, “Have you fought against them?”

“Yes,” Shikabane answers without pause. “My teammate was the jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi,” she says, again, very deliberately not looking in Kushina’s direction. Just as well, a conflicted expression blooming on her face.

In contrast to Mikoto or Hizashi–jaded by the clan systems as they were–Kushina had always wanted family. But the only reason for the Kyuubi to be transferred between vessels would be if the previous jinchuuriki were unable to contain it…

Still, Kushina was never one for shying away from something and so rather than continuing the somewhat worrying description of their new possible allies, Shikabane dutifully answers questions about Kushina’s successor–her son, Naruto–with as sparse details as she can get away with.

But not sparse enough.

“Who is Sasuke?” Mikoto interrupts as Shikabane is in the middle of an anecdote about her genin team.

Shikabane blinks, “He’s… your son.”

Mikoto can’t help the grimace that invokes, the idea that she had capitulated to the clan elders’ demands in some other life. Another thought crosses her mind and, with trepidation, she asks, “He’s not–was he the Uchiha clan heir?”

Bemused, Shikabane shakes her head slowly, “… No. Sasuke was never clan heir.”

Good, Mikoto thinks, at least that other version of her hadn’t fallen so far. Much easier to think she might have found someone she actually wanted to be with rather than end up brood mare for Fugaku Uchiha.

~

A/N: WELL. This certainly jumped around in places. I don’t think I had a real concrete idea about what exactly I wanted the things Shikako doesn’t say out loud to be, so I kind of just sprinkled a lot of different options in there.

Since you seem to like time travel and related tropes here’s a quote (that you could use as a prompt if you have the time) I found on an old drawing that I forgot the most of the context of: “You are not the man I love; and now you never will be.” I forget who is the time-traveler in that scenario; but good luck with your convention stuff!

A/N: Ooh, I do love time travel and sad things, anon, and this prompt is amazing… the problem is that my go-to gal for time travel and sad things, aka Leanne Peridot of Counterclockwise, is doomed to never be able to change anything so this wouldn’t work in that.

I do kind of have an idea to fill this prompt which I know is fairly bizarre and convoluted, but which I hope you enjoy anyway? Thank you for your patience!

(In)Difference Remix, Or: Kiyoshi Fixes Her Mistakes (and makes some new ones)

The Utsugi clan is small, barely worth the term “clan” all told. Their shinobi rarely rank higher than chuunin, never above special jounin, and they are more than satisfied with their niche role in the village.

Snipers.

No other bloodline or technique in Konoha is as talented at ultra long range assassination as the Utsugi clan, and for that they are regarded with mild distrust and disdain. For all that shinobi espouse hardening their hearts, cunning above valor, for the most part their warrior heritage runs strong.

There is no honor in the Utsugi clan’s abilities.

Honor does not get results.

That is what she needs now: more than honor, more than valor, more than the lingering, unbreakable ties of love, she needs results.

She needs to make things right.

///

Kiyoshi is not a fuinjutsu master–she knows the basics and just enough to tweak said basics–but one of her adorable genin is, with the chakra capacity to power even the most outlandish of seals.

“Sensei are you sure about this?” Kushina asks, even as she dutifully traces out the shapes onto the cave floor. Kiyoshi has sent Mikoto and Hizashi out to check the perimeter; with this team, that’s as close to a command for privacy as she can get, though given who is after them, it’s not entirely a throw away.

“Honestly?” Kiyoshi prompts, because for all that her students will always be adorable genin to her, they are adults now. Equals. She can be the confident jounin sensei or the honest fellow fugitive on the lam, but not both.

Kushina pauses, blinks her violet eyes up at her. For all that it’s her teammates with the doujutsu, Kiyoshi can feel that gaze pierce through her as sharp and thorough as one of her own arrows.

After a long pause, Kushina turns back to her work, answer received.

Kiyoshi, shamefully, is relieved.

///

The problem is Kakashi.

No, that’s not right. The problem is her.

The problem is that without her Kakashi wouldn’t exist–and he has to exist, he is so vital to success–but in order for her to restore the balance of the world, she can’t be involved.

As far as the story she knows is concerned, Kakashi doesn’t have a mother.

Or, no, that’s not right either. As far as the story she knows is concerned, Kakashi’s mother isn’t present.

That’s a very fine needle to thread, but she’s always had impeccable aim.

///

Sakumo is well protected, for all that he thinks he is the protector of his team. He is earnestly charming and charmingly earnest, but Atsumi and Hozue have always been more socially shrewd than him.

The first go around, Kiyoshi avoided him in a misguided and failed attempt to stay away from the thick of things.

This second go around, she seeks him out for one specific reason. It has nothing to do with love or affection–though that night, there is enough similarities to blur those lines–and everything to do with her using him.

The first go around, Atsumi and Hozue were amused by her. Fond and welcoming in their own way.

This second go around, they hate her guts. It certainly doesn’t help anything when, nine months later, she leaves her baby on the Hatake doorstep.

///

The man she loved, the man she married, eventually went on to become the Yondaime Hokage. The White Fang of Konoha who would guide the village through a world war and succumb to the poisonous whispers of hidden roots.

This man with the same name and the same face will never get that far. He is the scapegoat for the war, sacrificed on the altar of public perception, but no further. She will not allow it. She shouldn’t even be in the village now, she has far too much to do, but if there’s one thing she will allow herself it’s this:

The man she saves from himself is as much a copy of the man she loved as the gruesome corpse she left in the Hatake house. But there is something in his dull stare that belatedly flickers at the sight of her. Recognition, probably, but maybe something more.

///

They are not the same. They will never be the same. But that doesn’t mean that he won’t ever one day also hold a place in her heart.

~

A/N: … so… this is my Kakashi’s mom SIOC Kiyoshi Utsugi from (In)Difference who has already lived through a life in the Naruto world, witnessed the way her presence has made things terribad, then convinced Kushina, her student, to send her back in time so she can excise herself from the story. But she finds there’s a way to technically stick to canon without actually letting all those people die (basically, Kiyoshi builds her own secret society of canonically but not actually dead ninja)

I dunno. It’s convoluted. I think mostly I missed Kiyoshi and that almost cruelly knowing manipulation of the world around her.

Character Statistics: (In)Difference, Team Nobori

Genin

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Chuunin

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Jounin

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Mikoto

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Kushina

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Hizashi

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~

A/N: aka Team Pretty Longhaired Parents. Nobori = banner/flag or, alternatively, rising/ascending (completely different kanji, of course) which just feels right.

aka Team Kiyoshi for (in)Difference purposes, because the idea of Kiyoshi having to deal with these three as bratty preteens is hilarious to me.

For Konoha Team Designation purposes, I think they’re either a Team Two or a Team Nine (not for pun reasons, unfortunately). Neither Mikoto or Hizashi are “heavy-hitter” level, and while Kushina DEFINITELY is, I don’t think the village (at this point in time) wants to throw their only jinchuuriki/Uzumaki into the middle of battle. And besides I’m pretty sure Team Jiraiya (that is, the genin team that Minato was on) would have been the Team Seven of their generation?

I’ll admit I cheated a little bit by using each of their respective sons’ stats as a base and then tweaking as needed.

Also, not that this is really all that important, but I imagine these points in time being right at the beginning of their genin/chuunin/jounin careers. So, more accurately, the “Genin” stats are when they graduate from the Academy. “Chuunin” stats are when they first get promoted to chuunin, same with jounin. So the 29/29.5 of their “Jounin” stats are not their peak abilities.

Shikako Nara’s Guide To Delinquency and Military Insurrection, 2/? (2018-02-03)

(Rule Two: those who abandon their comrades are worse than trash)

Mikoto is checking the perimeter.

Checking the perimeter–ha! what an unnecessary thing to do with a Hyuuga on her team. The last time she actually checked the perimeter was probably during practice missions in the Academy, before she got assigned on a team with one of strongest Byakugan users and a chakra sensor whose range is only rivaled by her insane capacity.

Even with the near endless amount of ROOT teams after them, blank porcelain masks to match their blank emotionless faces, there’s no real reason for Mikoto to check the perimeter.

As if it weren’t just an excuse to get some space from her teammates, just a moment of manufactured solitude to breath and enjoy the cool, quiet night air and internally freak the fuck out over her life choices.

Defect from Konoha?! What the fuck was she thinking? She spent YEARS proving her worth to her assbackwards, misogynistic clan elders–clawing her way up to a jounin ranking despite their opinions about retiring at chuunin to bear children and contribute to the clan–and… well, actually, put like that it’s maybe more of a surprise that she didn’t defect earlier.

But she was willing to put up with all that bullshit because she did, despite the elders, love her clan and her village. She loved being a shinobi of Konoha.

But she loves her friends more.

Even when it’s been nearly a month on the run from Creepy Councilor Shimura’s hunter-nins trying to drag them back for, no doubt, imprisonment and torture and experimentation and, eventually, execution.

For her and Hizashi, at least. Konoha’s not going to execute their only Uzumaki and jinchuuriki.

But just because Konoha would never kill Kushina, doesn’t mean they would never hurt her. Or haven’t ever done so before.

And Hizashi may be one of the strongest Byakugan users in the village, one of the Hyuuga clan head’s sons even, but he’s not the right son. Not the one who lucked into the Main Family, free from a slavery seal that could and would be used against him. By his own clan.

By his own twin brother.

And of course, Kushina couldn’t leave that alone. And no one has ever built a seal that a trained Uzumaki didn’t consider absolute child’s play.

But every action has its consequences–it seems like these past few months have been nothing but dealing with consequences–and now they’re on the run from creepy Councilor Shimura’s minions in the middle of nowhere chasing some rumors about some other Uzumaki in the hopes that…

In the hopes of what?

This other Uzumaki will see Kushina and fall over themselves to welcome a long lost relative? Haven’t they just escaped from a village full of awful relatives?

And even if this other Uzumaki were the welcoming sort, whose to say they’d even be powerful enough to protect them from the full wrath of Konoha?

Mikoto loves her village, she does, even now, but Konoha–for all their reputation as the friendly one–is not one for mercy.

A part of her foolishly, futilely, wishes for their jounin sensei. Wishes that Kiyoshi-sensei were still alive to make everything better–to sweep in and make the problem go away with a few select whispers in certain ears and a convoluted exchange of favors amongst the village’s different departments.

But they are far from Konoha, further still from being those silly little genin trailing admiringly in their sensei’s wake, and anyway how selfish is she? She should be wishing that Kiyoshi-sensei were still alive for little Kakashi’s sake, not to cover up for their own grown-ass mistakes.

Although, if Mikoto is being honest, she’d probably do the same exact thing because  she does, actually, love her friends.

It’s a presence more than a sound that catches her attention, and her hypervigilance has her activating her Sharingan immediately.

The girl who steps into her line of sight is not a ROOT agent–or if she is, she’s a level higher than the rest–because her facial features shift into an actual human expression. Bizarrely, that expression is an almost sheepish resignation.

Mikoto spots Hizashi lurking in the trees behind their visitor ready to pounce while Kushina comes barreling in with all the subtlety and grace of a wounded water buffalo.

The girl just sighs as if she weren’t surrounded by three Konoha jounin.

Sorry, three former Konoha jounin.

“Okay…” the girl says, not bothered whatsoever, “I was supposed to be on my way to Wind Country right now, but the three of you seem to be in some kind of trouble…”

Mikoto catches the brief flicker of annoyance on Hizashi’s face before he shrugs and drops down to the ground, no use in hiding if she already knows he’s there.

“… and given that I just killed a team of ROOT flunkies who were headed in this direction, and all of your headbands have those super fashionable lines across the leaf, I’m pretty sure I know what the problem is, and I thought I should at the very least offer my services,” the girl rambles on, ignoring the surprised and confused glances Mikoto exchanges with her teammates.

“What are you even talking about?” Kushina asks, patience finally giving way to frustration.

Now it’s the girl’s turn to look surprised and confused. She looks at them like they should already know:

“The assassination of Danzo Shimura, of course.”

~

A/N: Shikako just barging and dropping cool one liners and breaking the minds of everyone around her. So hip.

Anyway, just a little personal headcanon for Team… uh… I dunno, Pretty Long-haired Parents. Specifically, Mikoto Uchiha, Hizashi Hyuuga, and Kushina Uzumaki. The timing probably doesn’t work–and Kushina was probably not on a team or Hizashi was on a different team or whatever whatever–but according to SQ “the timeline is made up and facts don’t matter” so I can do whatever I want.

I mean, not as much as Shikako can do whatever she wants, but still.

Speaking of, not that it much matters (I probably could have deleted that paragraph, tbh, but I just wanted it so much) but their jounin sensei is my (In)Difference OC Kiyoshi Utsugi who is also Kakashi’s mom–hence why I tagged it here even if it’s not canon for that either.

I dunno! I just wanted cool team combos!

I’ll probably do a Character Stats post for this bunch also.

Fake fic title: ” Point of No Return ” ( inspired by the Starset song ), Team 7 ( including Sai and Sakura too )

I don’t want to do another Friendship is a (Mutual) Con ‘verse, because I’ve done a lot for this ask box event and there’s also another post in that ‘verse on the way. Not that I don’t love that ‘verse, but I’d like to explore others.

… or come up with new ones?!

So I know you mentioned Sai and Sakura so that I wouldn’t exclude them, but I thought about it and I like the idea of a ‘verse about the two of them specifically.

Like a post-bad-guys-win/comeback/time travel!AU except instead of Shikako going back in time, it’s Sai and Sakura. Or, alternatively, a dimension travel!AU more in line with this anon’s original ask

But so as not to just recycle previous posts, let’s go in depth into this Sai and Sakura Save The World.

It’s pretty interesting because Sai has shown up early in DoS and yet he and Sakura haven’t met yet (as far as I know?) and their relationship would be inherently different from their canon relationship because while we consider Sakura as part of Team Seven still, in universe, nobody except Shikako would think that.

I mean, Project Miracle–she did help save Kakashi’s life–but she is firmly Team Anko now so…

Why would Team Seven send Sai, a ROOT trained spy, and Sakura, an elite combat medic taught by Tsunade, back in time instead of the three walking forces of nature that is the “core” Team Seven or even Kakashi (or Tenzo!) who have years more experience/information?

Maybe BECAUSE they’re a ROOT trained spy and elite combat medic taught by Tsunade.

So then we have to consider when and where such a pairing would be more effective than the other possible combinations…

The night of Naruto’s birth would be the most recent, I think (the Uchiha Massacre is already too late, they have to show up before then to be effective and stop the underlying political tensions and machinations). Sakura would be there to heal Kushina and Minato on the night of, and the both of them would be able to advise them in, primarily, getting rid of Danzo much earlier on and preparing for future catastrophes.

Reverse chronologically, the other possibilities are during the Third Shinobi World War, specifically when Team Minato are in danger, and maybe whenever Sakumo’s failed mission but at that point the information would be spread so thin and the repercussions so difficult to track that it’s unlikely.

And, anyway, I quite like the idea of Sai and Sakura hanging out with Kushin and Minato and seeing all of their friends as babies. It gives them a tangible reason to keep going because, frankly, by changing the timeline they no longer have a home to go back to.

And just the idea of irreversible time travel makes the title very ironic and sad and lovely 😀

To make it more sad, I wonder if the baby!Sai and Sakura die when time traveler!Sai and Sakura appear–like, the universe self edits and there can only be one of each, and obviously the babies don’t have as strong existences as these badass teenagers. And, also, there’s an excuse. Now I’m morbidly curious as to how many babies might have died due to Kyuubi chakra in the air.

Additionally, I wonder whether or not, because there are time travelers and the universe doesn’t need an SIOC to correct problems (not in a the-universe-is-sentient kind of way but in a balance-the-scales kind of way), Shikako’s existence is the same. Maybe there is a Shikako Nara but no SQ soul attached. Or maybe, even though they went back in time to help, their actions meant the Kyuubi was out longer and thus the baby that would have been Shikako (and Sai and Sakura) died from bijuu chakra exposure.

… I don’t think I want to go that far, though. Maybe no SQ soul at most, but no dead!Shikako, only because I think that’d be such a major blow to the time traveling team so early on that they wouldn’t want to make any other changes for fear of killing any more of their friends. And the whole “replacing their younger selves in the time stream” thing is already pretty bleak, for Sakura especially, since she actually grew up with her parents.

Anyway, I just quite liked the idea of Sai and Sakura time traveling together to save the world by saving Team Seven before they even know it. And also, Sai dismantling ROOT over a decade early and saving Shin.

And the possibility of Sai and Sakura getting swarmed by baby versions of Konoha Twelve is just too cute to pass up.

Reasons To Keep Living + headcanons, please.

Hm… I guess the headcanons are more just adapting more of DoS into the Princess Mononoke universe? But obviously some differences so…

Hope this is what you’re looking for, anon

~

Father isn’t your actual father–you’re human, not stupid, no matter what the boar clan scoff within earshot–but that doesn’t mean he’s raised you any less. It’s Father’s teeth that have provided your meals and Father’s fur that keeps you warm. His deep growling voice the first thing you hear in the morning and the last you hear at night.

Of course, usually that voice is saying that maybe he’ll eat you tomorrow, we’ll see boy, don’t test me, but you know he doesn’t mean it.

He feels guilty, after all. He was the one that killed your real parents.

///

There was a stranger, before, a generation ago. Vastly different and not at all like the stranger here now, but somehow the same.

She came with nothing but the clothes on her back, looking for a miracle.

Maybe she found it, maybe she didn’t–who is to say? She disappeared into the forest and never came back.

///

The Emperor sends an army to Konoha for weapons strong enough to kill a god.

They are lead by the greatest hunter, a man more wolf than person–or so the rumors go.

The Emperor wants eternal life or, at the least, an undeniable show of force. The hunter wants simultaneously a lot less and a lot more: he wants to avenge his lost teacher.

///

Your family is the oldest in Konoha, but Konoha itself is a very young town–only a few generations old.

Which is what confuses you: why did your ancestors choose to settle here?

Your family has hated–and been hated, if such a thing could be said–the forest for as long as they’ve been here. And yet, the walls of the town edge against the borders of the forest. For a people so obsessed with gaining power, why settle near the forest but never go inside?

There are secrets your family keep–even from you.

///

You are a stranger to these lands, and so it is not your place to say, but perhaps it is because you are a stranger that you can see with eyes unclouded.

This situation is a powder keg ready to blow. You’re not sure which side will light the spark first.

///

The god of the forest looks like a deer during the day and a living shadow at night.

~

A/N: again on my phone, hopefully will have my computer back tomorrow!

Check out the Ask Box Author’s Cut event!

So in the reminder to dream au what would have happened to his parents lab? Attacked by the corrupt police with Kurama? Oh maybe the tailed beasts are actually part of an ancient entity that the police stumbled upon and had put a piece in an Android to try and control. The one they used to attack Naruto’s parents escaped so they uploaded it along with Naruto?

@donapoetrypassion’s questions:
(I’m just gonna float some ideas/questions your ways as they occur to me): Shikamaru has a new cybernetic arm- in this verse, how did he lose his flesh one?

Does Shikako’s hypersensitivity diagnosis have an in-universe equivalent?

Oooh… Danzo’s stolen mind-control eye… in a universe where so much runs on robotics and (presumably) many people have robotic limbs…

If the word ‘enslaved’ possibly applies to Naruto, what word applies to this world’s equivalent of Sai? And why?

Shikako seems like an adult with a job- that do the other Konoha 12 do?

(Does the internet affect what kind of shogi/strategy games Shikamaru plays? Who he plays? Are there competitions? Is he a professional shogi player who doesn’t actually need an income from another kind of job?)

(As you can see, I took that invitation and ran with it. I’ll stop bugging you now, though.)

Oh wow, okay, I totally asked for this and I’m grateful for the questions, so let me just wade through these first… (Also, dona, your questions are in no way bugging me. Actually your questions almost always make me contemplate deeper ramifications for my AUs, so thanks!)

I’m still not entirely sure what happened to Naruto’s parents exactly, but I do think they were probably working on something to do with the Kyuubi. The problem is I don’t know what it is exactly, either, beyond something like a… sentient “nature-made” AI. Like… something on the scope of the internet. Or The Machine from Person of Interest. A sort of cybernetic eldritch horror that lives in machines and consumes code… so maybe the bijuu are a virus?

Um, yeah. So whatever Kyuubi is, the Uchiha probably had some kind of secret epic code to control it and the Kyuubi in turn took over the lab Naruto’s parents were working in?

Maybe they were working on putting the Kyuubi in a robot body so it could properly “live” except the Uchiha found out about it, wanted the Kyuubi robot, tried to buy it from Naruto’s parents, and ended up just taking it by force. Leading to the deaths of the Namikaze-Uzumaki family. (Unsure if I also want Naruto to have physically died but been uploaded into the robot body along with the Kyuubi, or if he’s still alive but doesn’t know it and his body has some kind of uplink connecting him with the Kyuubi robot body).

Shikamaru probably lost his flesh arm in an incident involving Shikako. I’m thinking something like… a tech expo and an overzealous rival/fan attacked her? But then Shikamaru got on the way and so there’s still guilt on Shikako’s end, as per canon–maybe this was pretty recent and the reason why she hasn’t gone home for family dinners in a while?

Shikako’s hypersensitivity diagnosis… it might be that she can’t have any cybernetic implants/mods. I know in cyberpunk universes, nearly everyone is modded to some extent, so the people who aren’t are unusual for some reason. Everyone has a ID chip, at the very least, but Shikako doesn’t even have that? (Which does make it a little ironic that she’s a genius with cybernetics)

Yup. Danzo’s got a Sharingan. I think in this AU the Uchiha clan are still alive, but Danzo might have stolen more the design for the Sharingan than actually plucking out Shisui’s eyeball. Then again, that imagery is gruesome enough to fit him.

“Enslaved” does also fit Sai, though perhaps it’s more… oh no… “groomed.” Danzo’s ROOT are actually human, but they have an implant that basically lets him wipe their memories and such and turn them into meat puppets.

All of the Konoha Twelve? I guess it depends mostly on what the clans would be in this ‘verse… except for Sakura who is, like in canon, a doctor/medic, TenTen who is also an mechanical engineer (though not so much cybernetics), and Lee who… what does Gai do?

As for the clans, they are probably like companies (or yakuza crime families) in the sense that the clan as a whole runs a business and the clan heads/heirs are probably the CEOs/training to be CEOs or are major shareholders who CAN live off the company but decide to work anyway. So for example, the Nara clan is probably a huge pharmaceuticals company (beginning to branch into cybernetics due to Shikako) but Shikamaru is also a professional shogi player.

Hm… what do the other clans do?