Flip to the Last Page, 32) things you said I wouldn’t understand
“I just need some time,” your sister says, eyes looking everywhere but at you. She’s packing, grabbing things at random, placing then removing then folding then replacing, anything to keep her hands busy.
“I just need to be alo–I just need some space,” she stammers, and you can’t hear anything in your head to refute that mostly because she’s slammed a wall on your connection, metal bars and concrete.
As the two of you grew, so did your control over your connection. No more the constant, unconscious flow of childhood–thoughts more often impressions than words–now you can utilize it strategically: plans and intel, Jounin Commander in the making. Or, rather, you would if your sister weren’t blocking you out.
“I just need to think,” she says, and this third time hits the worst because you know if she were letting her thoughts seep through, you’d hear the added “by myself.”
Futilely, you try to send your arguments through her barrier: why can’t you think here? You’re already cutting me off, obviously you’ve made space for yourself. Why won’t you stay?
If she hears anything, she doesn’t respond beyond the flattening of her mouth into a tight, tense line.
The two of you are supposed to be a team, siblings, friends, partners. She makes it seem as if your twin bond is nothing more than a prison. One with a life sentence at that.
That makes her soften, her furrowed brow transitioning from frustrated to contrite, but no less determined.
“I just… need to know that I’m not making things worse.”
A/N: VERY BELATED, VERY SHORT, VERY SORRY DONA! Apparently there’s a little bit more needed from me for Geek Show and also May is a hectic month for me in general. Also, FttLP is a massive mystery to me still despite it being something I wrote…
I feel sorry for this Shikamaru. He’s grown up around Shikako like a vine around a trellis.
I’m still trying to work how how different he is from DOS Shikamaru- he must be, at least in the “does not instinctually trust the village” sense.
…I don’t know if he even looks at his dad as a guide as much as he does his sister. He admires him, yes. But he wouldn’t instinctively go to him for things the way DOS Shikamaru would. And when he thinks about being Jounin Commander, it’s as a set. Even when he disagrees with Shikako, he’s responding to her. He’s not deciding things on his own.
I’m not sure he’d deal with losing her as well as Hiashi did. (To the extent that Hiashi was able to deal with it “well.”)
…I’m a little curious that Shikako might seek Hiashi out on this. She’s not gonna be able to go to anyone when she worries her existence will disrupt the future. But worries that she’s stunting her brothers growth as a person (and that Shika may be letting her)… maybe she can share that. I definitely got the feeling she was talking about both things when she said “making things worse.”
FttLP!Shikamaru is very different from DoS!Shikamaru (who is very different from canon!Shikamaru, of course). I wouldn’t say FttLP!Shika is more dependent than DoS!Shika–since I interpret a lot of DoS!Shika’s current frustration to be that he can no longer consider himself “Kako’s protector”–but there’s definitely a weird dynamic going on. Like, FttLP!Shika knew from the beginning that Shikako is a reincarnated adult and that she has knowledge that no one else does. While FttLP!Shikako had the same issues with chakra and some social anxiety like DoS!Shikako, which would prompt a similar protectiveness in FttLP!Shikamaru, there was still a sort of… he looked to her as the font of knowledge/experience whereas, as you said, DoS!Shikamaru would definitely go to their dad for instead.
The Nara twins would not be nearly as good at dealing with the other’s loss as Hiashi arguably was. Mostly because Nara are… not “designed,” per se, but trained? encouraged? to rely on strategic/critical thinking whereas the Hyuuga are more about full sight and reflexes… I probably ought to write more about the comparison/contrast of the different sets of twins…